PND need some hand holding, sorry...

[spinnergeologist]

I have been told by my HV I have PND. She had told me she was going to do some referrals but since that visit it has gone downhill. I have come to the conclusion I need to call the HV team and ask if anyone is free to visit today but I am nervous. I know that they will not take my DD away, I know they will not automatically put me on AD's and so on but I'm not fully rational at the moment. I am also not sure I can tell them I've started self-harming although I know I should. I am sure I am going to just breeze through 'oh its not so bad' and make light of the situation even though I came very close to dropping my DD when he started crying this morning, have gone through the crying for hours and all the other things that are classically PND.

I haven't gone to the doctors as you can only make appointments at 8.00am at which time I am generally BFing and have missed the cut off for the last few days I actually got together enough balls to go. I haven't got the strength for a emergency appointment at the moment as I had one last week when my DD refused to feed for 6 hours then (predictably) started feeding just after I got into the appointment. I know they would not judge me, but I am in a sane moment which might not last to getting down to the surgery.

Please help me keep up the strength to call the HV team and actually tell the truth.

Ring them, ring them right now

Honestly you'll feel like a huge weight has been lifted just by making that phone call.

They've heard it all before believe me but they can't help if they don't know-and you do need help.

Is there anyone family or friend-wise you can confide in who'll march you up there?

I think it has been getting worse this week as my inlays are inbound tomorrow. They are wonderful supportive people, but, I come from a family that just doesn't talk about depression and I find it very hard to talk to them about it. I also don't want to appear to not be comping (even though I'm not), that I'm needy, pathetic so on (even though they will not think that) and that I am not a fit mother. My mil is the perfect mother and I can't live up to that (not willing to give up everything to raise children). i know a lot of that is not sane, like I said saner at the moment.

I will call as soon as I can get a phone. Just realised I have left them in the bedroom and the carpet fitters are now working on the stairs, silly girl! Remembered to put the laptop, baby, dog and me out the way but not the phones!

in-laws not inlays ....

The Mil staying strikes fear into all of us (even me, and mine's genuinely lovely).
Don't forget she's the perfect Mother with 100% hindsight and rosey filters. I fully intend to be the same in my dotage

Should I still call if its just that? I'm sure it will be be better next week and don't want to waste the hv time. Just need to keep it together this weekend.

OK. Go and get the phone and make the phone call. Ask the nice man to throw it down if you have to but call now.

Putting it off over the weekend is not going to solve anything.
Get the phone number ready and dial.
You are absolutely not wasting anyone's time-they will be positively pleased to hear you ask for help.

Please don't wait till after the weekend. You risk it getting worse and consequently taking longer to come out the other side. Your GP will not mind at all. I have never been seen so fast, or offered so many monitoring appointments, as when I had PND. They take it really seriously these days. Honestly!

hi, I have talked to the hv who got me a appointment with the doctor who has referred me to the therapist. Thanks for the encouragement.

Good for you