Borderline feeling abandoned.

[selfdestructivelady]

My best friend is under the weather mentally as a result he has told me he won't be seeing anyone for a month but will still text me.

I know logically he isn't and needs time to himself but I can't help feeling abandoned.
I only get through each day because he talks me through it. I understand he can't do that anymore but I wish he'd let me return the favour.

Last time I felt abandoned by him I took a od please help me. I want to sh or od so badly. I know I'm being selfish but I just want my friend back I won't burden him with my problems I'm happy to listen but he's shutting me out. I understand this is what he needs to do but I can't help feeling abandoned so am venting here instead of at him.

I can feel a panic attack at the thought of not seeing him for a month coming.

Are you being treated by any mental health professional? If you are, please contact them asap and tell them how you are feeling. If not, see your gp urgently. You need and deserve to be helped. Being so dependent on just one friend is not a healthy place to be in.

I'm being treated by a psychiatrist and I'm awaiting further therapy. I know it's not healthy but we've been friends since I was two. He's stuck by me through thick and thin and he's my only friend.

In some other threads organisations have been mentioned that you can call to talk to someone. I'm unfortunately not in the UK so don't know what these organisations are, hopefully someone else can post and tell you. Do you have any family?

Yes I have three dc and a dh. I also have my mum nearby.

It must be really hard to deal with dc feeling the way you do. Can your dh and mum partially fulfill the role that your friend plays in your life?

No they can't as both work and my friend doesn't so he is there for me all day.

Plus I can tell my friend anything the same is not true of dh or my mum.