Do you ever wonder if this is your lot?

[Beauregard]

So fed up of feeling like im just exsisting

(((((((((((((pelvicfloornomore)))))))))))))))))xoxoxoxoxoxo

feel like it all the time, but then remember all the positive stuff i've done in the past, and all the positive stuff i'm going to go on and do. doesn't help much but also keep repeating to myself 'this will pass'. and it does, eventually.

just having a bad day but feel i will never be happy again

oh, you will, you will! it will pass. you know it will eventually. can you do anything at all that will cheer you up even a little bit, watch your favourite film, read a great book, listen to some uplifting music??

Ive been depressed so long that nothing seems to work when im like this.

Have you sought help from your GP? When I was having a very nasty bout of PND I had counselling and antidepressants, and although in the end I had to just 'get over it', the anti ds and counselling helped to break the cycle of depression. I wish there was something I could say to you to assure that you wil get over this, but I have also been in your position of thinking 'is this it?' and know how mentally and physically debilitating it can be. You are not alone. xxx

hello there pelvicfloornomore,
God, what u say is sooo familiar to me. I DO know exactly how u are feeling...sometimes i get so so scared because I dont think my brain can take much more of the negative thoughts....its like ill either end up in a vegetated state, or detached & rocking back n forth or well,... u know.

There are good days & bad days...today is a good day for me and if i can pass that on to u.... (im still hoping for that day when things get better too)

Its comforting to know that im not the only one like this but it doesnt change things does it?
BIG HUG 2 U HUN X

Pelvicfloornomore and sagimom, honestly you can come back from this. I have been in exactly the same state and in a few months you'll look back and see that little by little you have been getting better. Then in a years time you'll see what huge progress you've made. I know you can't see this now but I promise you it will happen.

Thank u anniedev for ur kind words..

Deep down i know ill get past it its just when ur down u can never see it like that...

One thing i have drummed into myself if nothing else is to never ever ever give up....even when im exhausted from it(which is often)and feeling like ive nothing left... i force myself to keep pushing on.

Yes you're right it is so so hard, but like i said, in a few months you will stop and think and realise that you are not having to try so hard as you used to, and little by little you will start to improve. You won't notice the improvement as it's happening, but it will happen, HONESTLY. xxxxxx

Thankyou both
I have sought help from my gp ,i have long term depression and have tried most anti-depressants but they either dont work or just mask my feelings.
I have seen a consultant psychologist who has referred me for intensive treatment but there is a 4 month wait!
I can be fine for days but then something small will set me off into a downward spiral and if im lucky it will last a day but more often it goes on and on.
My depression is a result of my family life growing up.

When I first had PND, the area I lived had a free counselling service, like local volunteers, maybe there is something similar in your area (not just PND)? Or have you tried the Samaritans, as they now do email support if you need it. Please keep posting here if you need to, you aren't alone even if you feel very isolated at the moment. I really feel for you. Have you ever tried cognitive behavioural therapy? That focuses on 'you can't change what's happened in the past but you can change how you feel/think about it' Sounds like it may be a good approach for you? I don't know enough about it to go in to detail, but I'm sure someone else on here will know about it. Keep your chin up, PFNM, and focus on the good days. Remember you're not alone in this and it will get better. I know I keep repeating that but it's true. XXXXXXXXXXX

Thanks for listening and being so kind

It's a pleasure. Hang in there PFNM. xxxxxxx

pelvicfloornomore - Hang in there I get like this but usually only if my thyroid meds are to low. Although just recently the levels are fine and I find myself sitting here staring into space silently screaming inside for someone to come and help me turn my life around as it all seems fairly shit at the moment. All I do at the moment is keep trying to focus on my beautiful children and keep telling myself that things have got to get better.

and they will get better, mummyhill!!