Ocd or something else??

[Weelady77]

Was wondering if anyone could give me any info??

I love cleaning and I'm not scared of germs but I have a thing about tidiness and bedrooms being organised to the point I can't go out until everything is in its original place and I know the place is clean and tidy! Today DH had a hangover (no sympathy) but he was just lying about the living room and I was getting agitated so I asked him to go watch tv in his bed but he refused so I went in a strop cause the place looked disgusting the xmas deccies were getting on my nerves so I got them all down and he knew I was angry so he helped me clean the living room and move it around!

DH and sons told me tonight I've got a problem but I don't think I have I just hate mess and although I don't understand people who have messy dirty homes it doesn't bother me that my friends homes aren't like mines that's just there way,

I'm quite happy the way I am unless like today I couldn't get to clean when I wanted too but I do realise and I've never admitted before to anyone, I do feel for my dd as she's still young and I can't take her out until I feel everything's done right which sometimes we can't go out as gets to late!!

They have got me thinking tonight regarding it I always go on the good house keeping board but think I'd get shot down in flames if I asked there advice!!
Does anyone think it would be worth a visit to the doctors or something I should just get on with and sort it out myself??

Im exactly like this....
I don't have the answers but will be watching this thread.

I can't sleep if my house is not in order, I get very stressed out by mess and things out of place.

I think mines stems from my mum, I wasn't allowed to play in my room or sit on the bed when I was young and she was one of those people who literally puffed up the cushions as you stood up!! I'm not as bad as that my kids get to play in there rooms and have friends in to play/sleepover BUT I can feel my self agitated until they go and I can clean up the mess!!

My mum is like this. On Christmas day she was itching to clear our plates away. She asked us not to buy Christmas crackers with glitter as she can't bear it! It seems more like a compulsion to have control over something than OCD possibly because she grew up with 5 siblings and a very messy house.

My dd on the other hand suffered from a very specific OCD and it affected every aspect of her life and was completely debilitating.

My mum was exactly the same weelady, my children play, have friends over etc but it gets to the point I'm itching to get in the room and tidy up.
I will Hoover many times a day, even if it's just a few bits on the floor, it can't wait I have to Hoover.
Everything has to be in it's place before bedtime, I have never been able to leave washing up, although had a dishwasher for last couple of years which has made things easier.

I find my obsessive tidying is related to my anxiety and if I get a room or rooms tidied I feel more relaxed. But my house is so big now and I have 4 dc so I cannot keep the tidiness in check and I'm more anxious than I have ever been. A few things that have helped are giving myself a time limit to tidy a particular room etc. And avoidance tactics, I just don't open the playroom door if I know I don't have time to completely fix it. I find it quite distressing at times both to be obsessive about it and when the kids have trashed a room. I try to actually keep track of how long it takes to tidy a mess so I know I can have it sorted pretty quickly, that helps me not to panic. There have been a few times in the last 10 years when I've been ok about mess and it felt great. Wish I could know what got me there because I feel my tidying freakiness rules my life and makes my dc uncomfortable.

If it helps I was once told by a professional that everyone is on a spectrum of some type of personality, but does not mean they have a personality disorder. The original personality spectrums she was referring to including schizo, obsessive compulsive, borderline, narcissistic etc. With some people having more than one trait at a lower level. It was explained to me like that, she said some notice it more than others. It is when a personality trait stops normal functioning that it can become an issue for the person, however. So depends on definition of normal functioning which is what psychiatrists are experts in assessing.

Good website

Rcpsych.ac.uk

Helpful leaflets on ocd which explain for all As well as other mh

Don't want to bastardise their info too much and make a hash so will direct there. Nhs pages are usually pretty good too. Ocd often has thoughts / thinking / reasoning behind behaviour which make complete sense to the person even if others may not get it. E.g. something terrible will happen if I don't do this/that and the inability to complete said action/thought can be crippling when it comes to function Although this Iis one example. Cleaning is a common aspect but not entirelly for all people with ocd. This is a brief description due to mobile posting and hopefully does not offend or trivialise ocd which can be highly debilitating

There are lots of crass websites which talk bull about mental health and offerquestionnaires aiming to diagnose. These websites are not always healthy and sometimes looking at diagnostic info as above isn't great either as we can all fit criteria at different points in our lives without actually being diagnosable. For info stick with legit sources (as above rcpsych, nhs, mind charity) and for yourself think as said By previous poster about functioning - How much is this affecting your daily living, relationships, activities? and think about what is important to you about your life and how or where you want to be.
Mh support is wide ranging and for some can be short term support for long term help. GPs are a good place to start if you want to access support

I have a side to my OCD which has nothing to do with germs, but where I have to have things In Order where I live as a way of having some kind of control over my environment.

If things are where/how they should be then I can pretend to relax a bit.

A lot of OCD is feeling things 'aren't right', nothing ever feels OK, you never feel comfortable, and if you do the OCD sets you wondering why with an uneasiness about what hideous thing will happen now to take you down a peg or two (doom scenarios).

Getting control over your 'things' is one way you can do something definite to bring anxiety levels down because you can see things are kind of clean and tidy.

It's hard to say whether the anxiety you have is because of OCD or whether it's your DH/sons trying to get out of cleaning up (although I'm grinning, it's not funny if they're seriously making out you have a mental health problem when you haven't to pressure you into leaving them alone on the housework front)

Are there any other things you've noticed are different to how other people see/do them? Counting/checking things, having to be symmetrical, favouring one side of your body over another, finding it difficult to let go of things/throw things away, things having to be done in a certain order?

They say it all the time to me (probably so I leave them alone )

I'm quite hung up on routine and when it's school holidays it's worse as I know I need to do things with dd but can't until it's done!!

Regarding counting touching etc the only thing I can think of is toilet paper it's got to be 7 squares! And when I'm using chemicals at work or in house bleach washing up etc it's got to be 3 squeezes!

I honestly think it's just house proudness that's just rubbed of a bit from my mum but my family don't understand why I want the house spotless all the time, I do think I should chill and relax and leave it and do things with dd but that's an obstacle I need to face!

I think most people remember the things they have to do by putting them in a routine, as well as measuring things by counting the amounts of times they do them (like the bleach).

But with OCD they get out of hand with the OCD threatening you with all manner of nastiness if you don't comply with its very focused/precise/time consuming rules.

It's good you don't think it's anything more than just wanting things to be straight (in your head as well as your house), you're organised and have to organise others so you've had to get together techniques to do it with enough time to have a sit down at the end of the day (although I suspect you don't ).

You could have a look online at what kinds of relaxation techniques are about? Something might catch your eye and suit you? You don't even have to buy a CD/book and can do a lot of the 'exercises' when you're in bed or wherever.