Concerned about dd age 5

[atomicYuleLoghurt]

OK tell me I'm being paranoid.

DD who is nearly 6 has been experiencing some very dark periods in the last 3 months or so and sometimes can't stop crying but says she doesn't know why she's crying. She talks a lot about being very sorry for all the naughty things she's done and seems weighed down with guilt.

I can't seem to reassure her that we love her no matter what she does and that when we tell her off once we've talked about it everything is forgotten. I end up just cuddling her as much as possible and getting a bit upset myself (although I try not to show it)

She's not a naughty child! She's always been very sensitive and had a lot of empathy with others. She has stress related vocal progressive tics sometimes.

I had undiagnosed depression as an early teen which I only realised about when I had very bad PND after dd2 and dd3.

Is what she's going through a normal phase for a 5 year old?

She's always been very sensitive and had a lot of empathy with others

hi Atomic, this must be really hard for you, esp when DD is getting upset. What you say here could be a lot of the reason why she can get so stressed but I'm no psychologist. It's just that she sounds quite like my DD with some of these personality traits, she can be quite obsessive and paranoid at times too. 6yrs old is a young age to have a lot of empathy and perhaps at this age is hard to deal with the feelings? Just a thought, I mean, a lot of adults I know don't manage any empathy!!

I think if it getting too hard for you to handle you need to talk to your GP, see how you go in the next few weeks but if it really effecting her day to day life or troubling you a lot then please seek some help, I'm sure there's lots out there and also prob MNs along who have been through this kind of thing. Wishing you all the very best, oh and keep doing what you are doing, sounds good, all the reassurance etc.

No massive advice I'm afraid but have you looked at bag of worries by Virginia Ironside? A way of airing the subject?

'The Highly Sensitive Child' by Elaine Arin has helped me understand my sensitive dd more.

Thank you I'll look at the books. I feel really guilty that maybe when I tell her off she takes it too much to heart, but she does have her moments and I can't let it slide!

sicily what you say makes a lot of sense. I have another daughter only a year younger and the difference between them is so marked. Dd1 is so sensitive but her emotional intelligence seems quite low whereas dd2 has always been good at talking about how she is feeling and is very good at using words to explain herself.

Maybe dd1 just doesn't know how to deal with what she feels.

I'll have a read.

I think you should also have a chat with a GP. She sounds very anxious, and the way she describes feeling sad is actually a very good way of explaining herself imo.

When I describe myself as depressed, I would say it feels as though I have taken on the problems of the world, and I feel heavy with that sadness.

I am NOT saying she is depressed, but I do think it may be worth getting a professional opinion, if only to see if they can give her some coping tools.

Yes I don't want to say she's depressed but obviously I am concerned about her mental health.

I had a look at the highly sensitive child book blurb and it talks about shy kids. She's not shy at all, easily makes friends etc. But I would say she's on the spectrum for attention and hyperactivity issues. She has some obsessive tendencies too. But of course all children are somewhere on this spectrum ans my feeling is as long as these issues don't affect her life then leave her be

But Christmas day she had a good hour and a half where she kept tearing up for no reason and just needed cuddles. :(

I will try and see a GP about it. I don't need to take her do I?

No she wouldn't need to be with you.