Counselling for PND?

[Koalagone]

I posted a while back when my DS was younger worrying about having PND and not being bonded to him.

He's now nearly 7 months old, I've been on ADs for 5 months and I still don't love him. I've been trying to convince myself that when he reaches certain milestones everything will change, as he becomes more interactive things will change... but nothing has. I still feel trapped when I'm with him, I dread having to leave work and go back home to him. I've been pretending I'm in love with him as DH is but I'm not sure I can keep it up much longer. I know DS can tell, he doesn't interact with me the same way he does with other people or cuddle into me like he does with others.

My GP seems to think as long as I don't want to hurt him nothing is wrong and we just have to wait for it to pass but I'm not sure how much longer I can cope. I want to be a good mum, I want to love him, but I don't know how to make that happen.

I've been looking into getting a counsellor and I just wondered if anyone else thought that could be a good idea? I'm not expecting a magical overnight fix, just desperate for something that can maybe help me at least work out why I don't love my DS.

You may find your HV more useful than your gp, as for people with babies less than 12 months they may be able to refer you for specialist pnd support - many areas have pnd groups, counsellors and support workers who can help with bonding issues ( things gp cannt easily refer to), so could you phone or see your or any HV next week and ask for support and tell them what your gp has done etc?

I know that there are quite a few support resources at the bigger children's centres if you go and ask for help there.

Have you been to your local children's centre, I did a free and very helpful baby massage group at mine, which is meant to be good for helping bond with babies.

I'm in the North West.

I left a message with the health visitor team this afternoon asking if they had any resources so hopefully I'll get a reply soon.

I tried a baby sign class at the local children's centre... I felt awful. All the other mothers were engaging with their babies, bonded with them and I was sat there feeling totally out of place, like everyone could tell. I know if I could get over the mental block then maybe it would help.

Perhaps by going to those classes you will pick things up, learn little things. More importantly can be to get out the house, meet others and hear their stories ... Believe me all mums will have different issues, put on fronts etc etc. but by telling all this to your HV team they can hopefully help you access things to help you bond or to be more confident that you are doing a good enough job!!