To think I am not an idiot...I realise what I am doing and reasons why...Xmas related.

[Badvoc]

So.
Been a Pretty bad few months.
My beloved dad collapsed and died in July. Later that same day my mother had a heart attack (she is ok)
My uncle died last week and yesterday my aunt was dx with inoperable lung cancer.
So, all in all I am feeling pretty low.
I am dreading Xmas. Dreading it.
I know dad would be livid with me...he loved Xmas - but this year will be very hard.
I have 2 dc and this year have gone a bit mad on Xmas presents.
I know I have. And I know why. I want to make sure my dc have a good Xmas despite me wanting to go to bed on Xmas eve and not get up til new year.
Please tell me I'm not the only one who does/has done this!?
(Haven't gone I to debt btw...just used up all my savings)
I keep seeing the "dc only need a few bits of felt and a satsuma to be happy at Xmas" and it's making me feel stabby.
I know Xmas isn't about material things...we will be going to the panto, the crib service etc but I would like my dc to look back on this Xmas with some fondness, not just as the Xmas after pop died iyswim?
I hope the above makes some sense...and thanks for reading.

It makes perfect sense. We though last Xmas would be the last one with my father. We dropped everything to be there, people flying in from abroad, lavished the parents with treats. We wanted it to be a lovely time despite the bad news, and it really helped.

I wish you all a really lovely time, and I'm so sorry about all your losses.

Thank you x

I don't think you're an idiot at all. There's a lot about the way this Christmas will have to be that you can't control - i think by buying lots of pressies you're trying to take control of one of the things you can influence to make sure your DC have a fantastic Xmas.

Nothing at all wrong with that. And what other people say or think about the 'right' amount of presents doesn't matter - everyone's circumstances and reasons for doing the things they do are unique.

I'm sorry for everything you've been though and hope you start to feel better soon.

You've had a crappy year and are absolutely entitled to deal with that in whatever way makes it bearable imho.

If that means being a bit indulgent then so be it.

I hope things are looking up for you and yours soon .

Oh good grief no you are not being bad or unreasonable or anything. You are a mum who is trying to make the best of a difficult situation, nobody could rightfully criticise you for that.

Sounds like you all deserve spoiling TBH. Go easy on yourself. And crucially - speaking from bitter experience here - please do NOT put pressure on yourself to make it perfect or overwhelmingly happy. If despite your efforts anyone (including you) is still sad - that's ok too.

Thank you all.
I am under no illusion that this Xmas will be anything other than very hard for me and my family.
But I dont want it to be for my dc.
Trouble is a lot of what I have bought are small things like slinkys, pens and colouring books, books etc...and thanks to the cursed Xmas bargains thread most of what I have bought has been pretty bargainous.
I think we are at mils for Xmas day so that's a pressure off.
Then I am doing a buffet on Boxing Day but it will be whatever I decide on the day...no major planning involved :)Might do some Xmas crafts with the dc..baking etc.
Am making no plans really...have realised lately that we make plans and the gods laugh :(

Often the cheapest most random things are the most well received. Craft stuff would be great too, have some ideas lined up (again, don't feel bad if you don't get round to it must take own advice :)) so you have something to do when the DCs need cheering up/distracting

You should have seen how much we spent on DS last Xmas, he was only 6mo so had absolutely no idea and definitely didn't need all that stuff. But it was the first Xmas without my mum and I was trying to fill the gap. Think it's pretty normal to do that.

I'm sorry for your loss goths x
That's the irony isn't it fuzz pig? They will probably love the gifts cheap tat in their stocking rather than the playmobil/nerf guns/ps3 games!!
I have bought an Xmas themed colour in table cloth!! :)
Not tacky at all :)

I don't think you are an idiot. I'm so sorry for your loss.

I was the same last year, after OH having a Tumour removed and then being flooded out it was a tough time.
We went overboard with the DCs to make it a good time . Even though we didn't have furniture DH/DS1 went and got a table/chairs on Christmas Eve and we were sitting on camp chairs .
This year will be much the same as we are having the new kitchen fitted in the next couple of weeks and the lounge is sorted at long last.
I've ordered all new decs/tree etc.. as we lost all of them in the flood.

I've also been enjoying the bargain threads.

I'm just going to make the best of it and enjoy having carpet underfoot.

Don't worry you are doing your best for your DC. Look after yourself.

Oh muddy...how awful for you! I'm so sorry to hear all that.
Good luck with the new kitchen! :)
I must stop looking at the bargain threads...dh is starting to hyperventilate whenever the postie comes :)
Thanks all, and I am sorry so many of us have had difficult xmases x

I am planning on getting the colour in tablecloth too! Big tub of pens on the table should keep us entertained.

What playmobil have you got?

I got the swimming pool for DD, she is really hankering for it although doesn't realise we've taken note of it so she will be over the moon. Picked up bargainous pirate ship (it's fecking huge, I had no idea til the box arrived ) and the pyramid but considering saving those for their birthdays in summer... oh decisions decisions.

I may be compensating for my playmobil-deprived childhood

Yep, OH is much the same with me. Last week we took lots boxes from Amazon down the tip. OH said I had more boxes that their warehouse

I blame mumsnet.

Thanks badvoc We are getting there slowly.

I got ds2 (5) the Melissa and Doug wooden castle from e bay for £20!! It's pristine. Very pleased. My sister had already given him some knights playmobil ages ago so he is playing with that ATM and I have got some more from e bay - a king and queen etc.
I have ordered the treasure transport for ds2 and the firing crossbow for ds1.
I really want the swimming pool now for myself
I haven't paid full price for anything...but it's still adding up
I blame mn too...I am constantly led astray :)

...the pirate ship is indeed huge...they got the pirate stuff last year! My sister have us the ship, and my mum bought another smaller one.
They also have some if the farm stuff too.
I LOVE playmobil.
And it keeps it's value...in a few years we can sell it and buy other stuff gin

Oh! And pils have got him some dinosaur playmobil!
Bloody hell, where am I going to out it all!!?