I have been depressed for as long as I can remember and I am now feeling like it is coming to a make or break point in my life. I have been thinking strongly about not being here anymore as life is becoming unbearable. I am constantly depressed, swinging between feeling apathy to feeling anxious. I hate myself, hate my life, don't want to wake up in the morning.
I have tried so many different things, different anti-depressants, numerous types of therapy but nothing has helped. I feel like I am stuck in a rut with the same negative thoughts going through my head. I feel like this is a lot of the problem, that I can't break out of these negative thought patterns and willpower is not enough. I have read a bit about EMDR being really good for PTSD but I don't think I have PTSD, although I sometimes wonder if I have suppressed memories which would explain why I have always felt like this. Of course I have had many disappointments and traumas in my life but I don't know what counts as PTSD and what I want to know if anyone who has not had PTSD has successfully used EMDR to treat depression/anxiety/obsessive thoughts?