Trying not to be all evangelical about it but......

[VulvaVoom]

Going on ADs has changed my life. Sorry if this is the wrong place to say this, I just wanted to let you know this, in case you are trying to decide whether to do it or not.

I resisted for years and would try to let every bout of depression pass. My last bout made me feel like running away, I felt like I was having a breakdown, I was scared and now I had my DD to think of.

I've been on ADs for almost 3 months and I feel like the real me has finally been able to come out after YEARS. I no longer feel the constant anxiety I had thought was just 'me' (often about things that were ludicrous) I don't analyse every conversation I have with people, I don't feel upset if I do something wrong driving, I am a much more confident driver in fact - and it's fun! I feel more relaxed generally and am realising this is how I was meant to be.

I still have self doubt and lack of confidence but it's not crushing. Downsides are: I feel tired quite a lot, am always hot and get sweats but I would say it's worth it.

I just wanted to say this - just try it, it could help you as it's helped me.

It's great there working for you

That's awesome - not enough positive stories about there so it's encouraging to hear. On a similar note, I would say something similar about group therapy classes. Before you go, you think: argh they'll all be weird / losers / mental, it'll be like AA, what if someone I know turns up?

But I found it was really awesome - full of normal people with remarkably similar experiences. So definitely worth trying.

Oh, you could be me! I feel amazing after a week on citalopram. I still have the same concerns but they don't consume me and I can be with my children without overanalysing everything they do. I still lack motivation but I think the depression effects come slower than the anxiety ones from what I read so I'm hopeful.
Like you, op, I've got the sweats and I've been very tired, but it is so worth it. I am trying not to think of the twenty years or so I've had this crushing anxiety and looking firward to a life without it.

That's great to hear. I hope you go from strength to strength

Thanks for your kind comments.

BBGloom I felt the effects quickly too and am also on Citalopram. Afraid to say the sweats don't really pass so I just don't wear a coat at the moment (going to look very odd in Dec!) The motivation will come, I can't believe the change in me.

I hope someone reading this will decide to try them, I guess they don't work for everyone but I desperately wish I'd done it earlier. I always forget how bad it is when I'm not 'in it' but when I am, it's just all consuming and overwhelming.

legogeek that's interesting, I had discounted it for precisely the reasons you mention, maybe I'll give it a try.

I'm glad to hear about the motivation. I just want to feel able to do stuff again. Chronic procrastination here. I have been a bit short today and a bit of anxiety about dd crept in but I guess it won't all go in a flash. Plus I've had a poorly dd who's been keeping me awake. Normal people don't function well when sleep deprived so I have to go easy on myself and accept I am actually unwell.
Did you start on 10mg, vulvavoom? I'm contemplating doing what the gp said and going up to 20mg but just worried about side effects being worse.

I do t

I started on 20g and I actually think to start with it made me a bit 'manic' but then it settled down, I would be happy to stay on this dose for a while.

I agree about what you said about 'normal people' I try to say to myself now if I'm sad, angry, frustrated that it's normal and not the depression.

That's good to hear. This is the perfect thread for me, thank you for starting it. Today has been good - after a bit of a disaster where dh took the dc out so I could get stuff done and I did...nothing, I've started gently to reclaim, our house. Again, "normal" people who've had builders in to do a big project in all bar one of the rooms of their house and have had it go on three month longer than planned might feel jaded by the prospect of regaining order so I must go easy on myself.

I'm glad it's helped

I'm feeling stressed today too as my DD appears to not be feeling well either, she's just 1 and I worry like mad when I don't know what's wrong - before my anxiety would have been through the roof but it's now manageable may have to have a glass of wine though!

Okay, so today I had the first whole day on my own with all three dc since starting medication. Normally I'd be shouting by 8.30, panicking about telly consumption, anxious about dd and how she was being towards ds. Not today. Really relaxed morning and dd and ds played snakes and ladders and I was able to leave them to it and recognise how well dd was looking after her little brother. Then we had a whe afternoon out at a play park/soft play with no tension. I realised I actually have very nice children. Then we went to the supermarket and I realised that this was not going to work (who'd guess?) but got a few bits without losing it or blaming myself.

Honestly, for me, citalopram is a wonder drug. I'm also practising my best cbt techniques in not regretting the years I've missed out on because I've been resistant to taking ad's.

How's your dd, vulvavoom?

Sounds so positive for you, really glad they've helped so much. Hope I'm not crashing the thread but have been resisting ad's for years myself - was even given a course of diazepam twice after 2 separate bad panic attacks but stuck with the panic attacks rather than take a single pill because of the horror stories and side effects. Have had bouts of depression and anxiety for about 15 years and just muddled through them because I've been too scared of ad's.

Would really like to ask a couple of q's - do you feel 'woolly' or dozy at all with them or do you feel clearer on them? Have learnt to tolerate most parts of depression/anxiety but the last couple of years I've been feeling more and more foggy, like my brain's slowed down and I'm so sick of it it's probably the one thing that would push me over the edge to ask for ad's if they'd just let me think again! Also, how long did it take for them to kick in and feel like they were working?

They kicked in almost instantly with the effect on anxiety. Took first one in the evening and the next morning I was a different mother (which is my measure of anxiety-was ultimate shouty mum ). I haven't felt drugged type drowsy but I did feel super tired for a few days. That's what's so great-I was worried about feeling woozy but it's actually given me clarity. For example, one of the things that used to get me in a head spinning tizzy was not having enough time to get children ready in the morning, having thought I did. This week I could think clearly about what I needed to do to get the right things done in the right order and also talk pleasantly to the dc.

I suppose you hear more if the horror stories because that's what people need help, support and advice with. There's no need if you go to doctor, get pills, they work, you're better. (Although I'm aware it's still early days for me.)

Hello, DD is not great but don't think she's ill, she's just gone mad for the taste of cows milk and screams like a newborn for it (she's just 1) whole other thread!

I don't feel woolly on them, just tired, I think I do feel more clear headed but that's mainly becuase the negative rubbish in my head doesn't consume me any more. The effects started immediately - and be aware if you forget one tablet, they wear off quickly too. Like I mentioned before, I almost felt too 'high' to start with but it settled down and now I'm on a level I'm happy with.

Maybe try a low dose to start with InSpag?

Thanks so much for this thread VV, I'm so happy for you that the ADs are working. I'm sitting here with my pack of Citalopram 20mg just collected from the chemist and after consulting Google for the umpteenth time on why I should/shouldn't take ADs, I finally remembered to turn to MN (doh!). I've been here 3 times before and this time I'm determined to do it properly, look forward not back, get some clarity and enjoy taking control of the self-doubt and anxiety. (BigBirthday, I'm so with you on not wanting to be ultimate shouty mum too). VV this thread was just what I needed to 'hear' and reminded me that the side effects are totally worth it, so to you. Hope you get to grips with DD going mad for cows milk and she's not coming down with anything.

Go for it fay and let us know how you get on. Be prepared to feel a little high to start with, for me it made me feel like giggling at nothing!

Now thinking it's teething with DD (first molar) have never ever seen her like this and she's got 8 teeth already. DH has taken her out today as I'm at work at CM is on hols.

Thanks VV, will take first tab tonight and report back. Frankly feeling high would be a bonus and since I'm a bit of a giggler anyway, sounds like there's a strong chance it'll go that way - fingers crossed for more giggling and less of the sweats etc. DH is pre-warned!

Ugh to teething, poor DD. My DS (18mo) has a perma-rash on his chin from all the dribble, and still only 8 teeth to show for it. Have you tried an amber necklace?

Oooh, no I hadn't thought of that, worth a go! I watched a programme last week where the mum swore by Amber necklaces.

Good luck with the first tablet

I've just been to my GP today and brought home a packet of low-dose ADs for anxiety. I took my first one at lunch-time, and do feel very very tired. Was contemplating not taking any more, because I am worried about the side effects, and having to be weaned off them, but I guess I should give it a go and see. Interesting to read above about the 'ultimate shouty Mum' - that is me, completely, and the school run is my absolute nightmare, so I am nervously keeping my fingers crossed that I might see an improvement. Good luck fayummummy.

Ooh thanks all and good luck too happynappies, sounds like it will be worth sticking it out once the initial side effects have passed. Fingers crossed.

I saw that prog VV. I was a bit meh about the necklaces but thought it was worth a try since my dsis had passed one on. I didn't notice a difference myself but the nursery staff all commented on how upset ds was one day when I forgot to put it on