Ok. Im proper fed up and in need of a rant. Possibly some advice also.
My partner of 4 years, suffers from PTSD and tries to self help using cannabis.
Not the actual marijuana. The brown bits of it.
Now everyone knows (including him) the effects it can have on you.
Yet, he continues as he thinks it helps. (It doesnt).
Being honest with you, I haven't had one single day (not exaggerating) with him not being stoned, or drunk.
If he has no smoke, he will buy drink. But much prefers smoke as drink makes him angry.
He will be fine, and we plod along like a normal couple. Every few weeks however, he gets to a point...where I actually believe he should be sectioned.
Yesterday is a fine example:
It was my dads bday.
Only i wasnt too sure whether it was yesterday or today. I had got myself all confused over the actual date..im terrible, I know.
He kept telling me to ring and double check. But I felt convinced it was today.
I also didnt want to ring as to make them aware that i wasnt too sure. As i felt bad about it.
But as tim went on, it was getting closer and closer to my dads time to leave for work. I was worrying incase my being adamant was wrong. So i rang them.
Pleased i did as i was wrong and his bday was yesterday!
Only i just so happened to ring when my partner was out.
Now he feels that i deliberately waited til he went out to ring them. When i didnt.
He doesnt know why he feels like that, bit i have to accept it as it is his way of feeling.
Nevermind how i feel of being accused of something i didnt do.
So he errupted into a big arguement.
Even with me saying even if i did do that, what is the problem. What do you feel i would have done that for. So we could work through it. But he didnt know. Saying he didnt care. It was the fact i had lied. Only i hadnt lied.
So he kept on going. Then accused me of repeatedly bringing it up. When i wasnt.
I had simply rang my dad to find out the exact date. Which i didnt want to d in the first place and wished him a happy bday telling him we would be round later with his things.
But this arguement went on for hours. Then it subsided. I got the impression the light switched on and he got it and realised h was going overboard.
So this morning i told my partner the plan of going to my dads today for tea.
This errupted. Him claiming that i never mentioned that he was going and that he wasnt ivited. Saying i didnt want him tl go, nor did my parents. I was just saying i said that to him this morning so to try and prove him wrong. - but i did mention it to him, and we actually had a conversation about it!!!
So we never went round for tea as we were arguing. So i got wrong for that too.
Apparently, i deliberately didnt go to put the message across that i couldnt because he is a control freak and didnt want me to go!!
Funny thing is now...he is talkkng to me as if nothing has happened.
After accusing me of twisting everything he has said and using it against him. Saying i called him a control freak - when i didnt - he did!
What the man! Is it me? Did i really do such a bad thing ringing them when he was out?
I really, really didnt have a hidden agenda! It was just because of general worry.
But this is all my fault because of the phone call yesterday and because i never told him he was coming with me to my parents for tea when i did!!!
Am i insane?