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Any suggestions what my DP can do for his friend?

3 replies

unlucky83 · 10/10/2013 22:20

Was going to post this in chat - but actually think here might be a better place for it...
DP has a friend - someone he met working somewhere a couple of years ago -
He is foreign (EU) - so no family around, early 30s, single (but has had some dodgy relationships), works dead end jobs - part-time , has been banned from the local shopping centre for shop lifting Hmm, has been homeless for a while and smokes a lot of weed...(not sure if DP knows his family background etc)
Apparently he is very likeable Confused (someone else DP knows - respectable business person knows this guy and likes him too)

I don't really know him (even DP doesn't like the idea of him being around the DCs or our house) - DP sees him every few weeks ...usually out and about ..
Apparently he has been showing signs of being paranoid for a while now (probably due to the amount of drugs he smokes) - he thinks the other residents in the hostel have it in for him, they are 'talking at him through the walls' - DP thinks he is hearing voices - he says he has been to the police because of the behaviour of the other residents but the police did nothing (we don't know if he really did or not).
He used to go to the gym regularly - but can't afford it now...he is really skint ...he isn't working as much as before - and he spends most of his time hanging in his room.

DP went to his room (a bedsit thing) today - it is in an absolute state - really dirty - although guy himself is always clean -
DP thinks he needs help - but doesn't want to get him in trouble - or to know it was DP who 'reported' him or whatever he needs to do...
(It might be 'just' the drugs but it could be an existing MH problem ...)
So does anyone know what DP can do to help him?

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unlucky83 · 10/10/2013 22:39

Ahhh - sorry I know noone has replied yet anyway but DD has just thrown up ...don't think I'll get back to this tonight - but any advice gratefully received will check back tomorrow...

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HoopHopes · 10/10/2013 23:23

I am not over knowledgeable about drugs but I think drugs such as cannabis can cause psychosis and obviously they are illegal for many reasons, including being dangerous to his health.

There must be charities around for people taking drugs, would he be willing to go and talk to someone about his addiction? Is he prepared to stop the drugs and seek help? Unless he is willing to seek help himself ( gp, referrals etc), or is a danger to himself or others then he cannot be forced to have treatment.

Shame he cannot afford the gym. As sounds positive for him ( guess if in hostel, not earning, buying drugs it is a desperate place to be). Does your dp go to the same gym, maybe treat him to one session and have a chat? Sorry, not the best of ideas.

unlucky83 · 11/10/2013 11:00

Thanks Hoop
I was wondering if my DP could persuade him to go to GP etc -but it seems at the moment it seems DP is one of the few people he still trusts - but I think it is fragile ...I don't know if that would turn him against DP too - he does seem to to think almost everyone has it in for him ...
Even the police for doing nothing when he complained about the other residents - if indeed he did complain and he doesn't just believe he did - from what DP says I would have thought the police would have picked up on something not being quite 'right' if he told them what he has told DP.

He has nearly come to blows with other people in the hostel etc over this voices thing - it isn't shouting -it is whispering and when he is in bed mainly so he can't get to sleep. (I guess DP could find out what they were 'saying' to him...)

It would be fantastic if there were some agency who knew about these things who DP could ask to visit him and assess his condition -without them knowing it was DP.
But maybe some drugs helpline thing could point us in the right direction...I will see what there is in our area.

(I know someone who job involved helping people with, among other things, schizophrenia so I know they can believe things happened that really didn't.
And I may be overly sensitive about this - a friend's boyfriend's younger brother had MH problems - probably originally drug induced -I met him a few times when he was staying with my friend - supposedly well and we all thought he seemed fine -then they discovered he had been lying in bed night after night slowly trying to cut out his own heart because the voices were telling him to Sad)

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