Can't trust my psychiatrist, have marital problems and friendship problems I also feel ssuicidal.

[Crawling]

have bipolar type scizoaffective which is all the symptoms of bipolar and episodes of schizophrenia and I've been really struggling through this a close male friend has helped me out a lot. But the problem is my friendship is causing me marital problems which is further destabilizing my condition.

I can't bear the thought of life without either my friend who is always there for me or dh. But my psychiatrist has made his views very clear that he doesn't believe I should have male friends at all.

He even said with my condition and the fact that I get hyposexual it's not a good idea for me to have contact with any men who are not either my dh or family.

But if I'm hyposexual I will find someone to sleep with regardless of whether I have any male friends. But I feel I can't tell him about the arguments dh and I are having because of his views on married women having male friends.

This boy has been my friend since I was 2 yo I don't want to lose him especially as he is my only friend. Most don't want to be friends with a severe mentally ill girl.

This friend has sat with me when I hear voices and calmed me down there are not many people capable of that. I'm very lonely and I don't work I am looking for work and attempting to join groups to make me less dependant on my friend. We have in the past crossed sexual boundaries when I'vwe been ill. Dh and I don't stop arguing about this and while I can see his points I'm scared to do what he wants.

I love my dh very much for putting up wwith me but dh is also controlling which under the circumstances is understandable. He doesn't want me to get a job or go out with my friend or go out with other friends. I have slept with a previous friend while manic and in a relationship with dh.

I just want someone to listen without judging me. Thank you if you've got this far. I also because of paranoia find it hard to make new friends as I immediately distrust people. Plus I'm scared of them finding out about my illness and facing prejudice.

I feel so close to the edge and I'm so close to jumping. My thoughts are racing and I don't know what to do.

Sorry for mammoth post just needed to get it off my chest.

I'm listening.

Thank you favoritethings it means a lot.

Hi Crawling, that sounds like a nightmare. Of course you can't give up your friend. Friends like that who will stick with you through thick and thin are worth their weight in gold. I know that if I lost my best friend (who happens to be male too) it would leave a real void.

Could you, your DH and your friend come to an agreement between all of you that if you start getting hypersexual, that your friend withdraws for that time until you start to get better again? Maybe if there was communication between him and your DH, your DH would feel better about it.

Sorry you're feeling so shit. Your Psych sounds like a dinosaur - there's a few of them about.

Keemanaanandcurryon thank you very much He is a good friend. I will try your suggestion thank you it may work well.

Waferthinmint my friend was in a very bad place when he did that I'd rather not say how because it's not mine to share but suffice it to say it was bad.

I also while manic blackmailed him something I am really not proud of I said that I would sleep with numerous people if he didn't and that I'd make sure they were the most abusive I could find. He and I had phone sex and exchanged some photos and videos. But I forgive him for that as he was in a extremely bad place himself and he did refuse to sleep with me.

He has seen many episodes and only slipped once. It does take two but he was not himself at the time. It means a lot that you admire my honesty it really does.

But I do see your point and it is too much to ask dh to forgive him as well. I guess I have to make a choice I don't want to but I guess I have to.

Thanks waferthinmint I guess I have a choice to make I'm not sure what it will be as I can't think straight right now.