cant cope

[smallcat]

Hi new member have 4 kids , 2 step daughters who ive brought up and 2 1/2 year old dd and 11 month son. 2 year old has serious dairy and egg allergy which we manage fine but year ago started getting bad vommiting and on going mushy nappies on and off. then in last month just after fairly sucsessfull potty training it really went out of control and she was doing these tiny smudges of poo every 3 mins and her bottom went like open wound . it became battle to keep her clean - sceaming crying etc . ended up in hospital they ve done some tests but think it could be aonother intolerance and we are home waiting on test results eating only rice crispies. Had two nice days for the first tine in 4 wks on tues and wed but today just awful and her behavior is suffering . I feel like ive failed and ive lost her. hardly have time for baby son, had post n d which lifted in feb but i just feel im being tested so far. lost it tonight screamed and cried. feel terrible and pathetic. i want our lives back

oh smallcat once in a while you may need to scream, dont feel bad about it, you re not pathetic just doing a busy job.
do they get on together and can u play with them together - in the bath? after a hard day

it ll come right for oyu and her and her allergies will get sorted. how bad are her symtoms?

wanted to just send you lots of sympathy. I only have the one DS and that sometimes feels like work enough so cant begin to imagine what it's like with 4 kids.

I do know about allergies though, DS has them - same as your DD - and it sometimes feels like just one more reaction or symptom is like the last straw and it can seem so unfair and I wonder why he is like this.

You're not terrible or pathetic. please dont tell yourself yet. Would you say that to a friend?

You're not failing her, you're doing the best you can. Allergies are so complex and bring with them issues in the long term for people caring for kids with allergies.

thanks so much for replying - Her allergy to dairy and eggs is fairly serious and she has an epi pen though we have never had to use it. I just never let my guard down with her and food so these days since the first couple of reactions she hasn't had a reaction. At the minuite having been on rise crispies for 8 days she is hardly doing any poo just tiny smudes but less frequently so her bottom is able to start to heal. But she is so whiney and grumpy, demanding, and seems uncomfortable every so often and almost cries - now i don't know whether it's soreness or acidic poo or constipation. Still every clean up is a fight and an ordeal - i got accidentally kicked in the face this pm and at bath time she doesn't want to sit in the water. She is also - like kids do when they are ill playing up and taking advantage and i feel pushed around. I know it's so much better than the night we went to hospital but i'm just getting so weary and miserable from it . The 2 good days were such a blessing but only made me realize how crap it is now it's bad again. I love being a mummy - being at home etc but this year with first the p n d and now this i just feel everything keeps in the way of enjoying it.