cant even be bothered to think of a thread title

[NappiesGalore]

my get up and go has got up and gone. am so bloody tired. sick of caring so much and wanting so much to be a great mum and then feeling like a teeny tiny piece of crap when i do something crap like shouting in the face of ds's who are too bloody young to even know what im on about, let alone jump to it and do as i ask the first time.

and i am sooooooooo tired of listening to constant bickering and whinging of small voices over every little thing.

i have absolutely no right to complain because im lucky as hell, have no worries or pressures atall other than raising the kids and even that i can afford help with...

...i just feel so tired. so sad. and so lonely. and then seeing that in print, i feel bloody stupid and pathetic too.

dont know why im posting this. guess i just want to say it to someone, and i dont want to say it to anyone in RL, so MN will have to do. im not looking for any answers, by the way. i know all those (hah!) i do though: get more exercise, keep busier, spend some time on other things for a bit etc etc. and help is on the way - a lovely canadian girl we had as a summer aupair last year is coming back for a coupla months this yr arriving soon, so that'll be a kick up the bum to get on with stuff and stop bloody wallowing.

but for now, i just cant seem to stop wallowing.

Nappiesgalore, so sorry to hear you're feeling like this. FWIW I can completely sympathise with the 'sick of caring so much' bit - exactly what I was thinking yesterday. Sorry - no help really, but thinking of you.

thank you jackieNo. thinking of you feeling the same way too.

'spect its the humid weather doing it.

NappiesG. Somehow you need to fill up your tanks as you sound like you're running on empty. Wallow away. Sometimes it's hard to climb back up before you have had a good old wallow. I find crying helps too. I think the advice to 'keep busy' and try to forget about it is crap advice. It'll only come out later or in some other way. Have a good old wail.

I'll let you into a secret. It's only the WWW after all. . When I get really low I get in the car, drive out to somewhere nice wailing, swearing and crying all the way. I find it refreshing.

Is there something you can do for yourself? Can you get any relief from the grind? It's very tough so don't be hard on yourself.

Not much advice either Nappies, but just to say feel a bit like this myself - 'running on empty' a good description. I think it comes when I haven't had a break from my 3 for a while - I need to build in some little breaks to look forward to or everyone suffers.........thinking of you and know how you feel.

Yes - definitely having a really good cry helps. And kicking things. Was there some research that showed that crying gets rid of some toxins or other and that it really can be therapeutic, or is that wishful thinking? Weather's a bit cooler today, around us, anyway, hope it's eased a bit for you too. Don't feel lonely - just come on here and talk to us. And wallow if you want to - we don't mind.

It must be something in the air - been feeling the same recently. Unappreciated and just had enough of being Mummy and not ME.

I remember the research on crying too. I'm sure that it said thattears definitely contain toxins and that crying is therefore cleansing and biologically very useful.

I know that running on empty feeling well too - seems particularly prevenant amongst mums of ds's IME. Hang on in there. And keep posting.

oh thank you peeps.

so nice to be comforted by people who understand (none of my good friends are parents and none of the parents i know are good friends, so i can get a little isolated)

and i think i read somewhere that there are chemicals or something in tears which help to calm you, so yes, a cry helps. im usually too tired to bother with the effort of crying though! sounds stoopid, and id prefer the release, but i usually end up just sitting and staring instead.

i do the driving off on my own bit too. park up somehwere, talk to myself for a bit, get bored, remember something i want to do/say/buy and drive off again. 5 minutes of peace is sooooo nice.

anyway, thank you all for your kind words. makes me feel all warm inside

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