Jobseeker's Allowance and anxiety getting out of control again. Please help

[squirkle]

Just had to start signing on for JSA and in the last 2 weeks my anxiety has got really bad again. I can't meet all the requirements they make but I need to as i have no other income for me and DC to live on except Child benefit and tax credits. What makes it worse is I agreed to everything too as it was easier than try to explain and I don't want them to think I am a scrounger. I just can't do it all.

A few weeks ago I was starting to get my life together and things were good for us all. We had a good routine going, I was even volunteering twice a week and everyone was happy. Now the house is in a bad state again, the DC are in meltdown every day after school and I am scratching my skin all over so much, no where isn't red or covered in scabs.

I can't cope with it anymore which is making the anxiety worse and it is spiraling out of control and I don't know how to stop it.

I'd go and see your doctor, are you on any medication?

No, I'm not on any medication. In the past the doctor has given me ADs but none of them ever made any difference. But when I said that to the doctor I got accused of not wanting to try to get better, which isn't true.

OP I do think you need to go and see your GP and try different types of medication. I also suffer from anxiety quite a bit, I'm on beta blockers for migraines so my doctor won't give me anything else. When I'm bad I take antihistamines for a short while (a week or 2) and they do help quite a bit. Could you try something like that?

I hate the jobcentre.

What requirements do they want you to do?

Try imipramine. Sometimes it takes a lot of trial and error to find the right medication for you.

If you're not comfortable maybe see a different gp within the practice?

tried imipramine before, it had no effect. I take antihistamines anyway for allergies. i'm serious, in nearly 20 years of trying different stuff, I never found anything. don't know why people find that so hard to believe. easier to believe I am lying I guss. after all I'm the crazy one not them.

the requirements, they are not so unreasonable you know. apply for 10 jobs every week. 35 hours a week between 8.30=4.30 mon-fri plus 90 minute travel each way. so 7am to 6pm every day cos thats what the childcare hours are. also occasional weekends and take on a job in 48 hours notice

so thats the standard, what they ask everyone round here to do. I can't disagree and say no way can I do it cos they will thnk i'm a scrounger and stop paying benefit. i wish it was different and I didn't need to get JSA just to live on for me and DC

but the truth is there is no way I can do it and no way I will let my DC go through that. i would rather kill myself than do that and let them go lie with someone who can care for them properly. Not let them live a life of unhappyness in school or childcare all the time because they can not cope with that.

Hi you may find a part time job though that is better suited for you. Does not mean you have to work part time. Or that you will have a job with that much travel. It is hard working and using childcare but sadly if we have children then realistically work often has to be done to pay for children. Sadly the days of low cost of living and mums not working is long gone. I hope you find a local job and perhaps one with school working hours to help? Quite a few jobs can be flexible with hours and even if you have to take full time hours you can request to go part- time due to family commitments.

Hmm, so the children whose mothers work are suffering a horrific life where being an orphan would be better? I realise you're struggling so I won't jump on that ridiculous statements, other than to say you need to step back and try to control the anxiety so that you can think through your future and options more clearly. There are plenty of other med options besides ad's, but GPs are generally very reluctant to go down that route. Can you/have you asked for a referral to a psychiatrist?

No not all children, but my children because of their disabilities would not be able to cope in childcare fulltime. Is that so hard to believe? Or am I making it all up because, you know having kids with SN is so much fun? Last time my son went to after school childcare 2 days a week, his behaviour deteriorated badly, hitting, spitting, biting and screaming every time he came home. He wouldn't sleep until after midnight, then when he was asleep he started wetting the bed again. am I wrong for not wanting to choose that for him every night?
DD isn't even coping with mainstream schooling right now and because she has a statement and 1:1, a lot of childcare won't even accept her. If I find one that does, I would have to apply for funding anyway which would take more than the 48 hours the jobcentre requires, but I can't turn it down otherwise they class me as not being available for work. It would cost more than me being there for her after school caring for her properly for free anyway, but of course that just doesn't fit the current political agenda.

Have you applied for carer's allowance if you caring for disabled children, that may help? And New version of DLA if children qualify? May help financially.

Is it worth asking in SEN forum how other single mums cope with work with SEN children as they may be able to share what they do and what helps?

Sorry OP, you said nothing about SN in your posts and thus I had no way of knowing!

What ADs have you tried? There are so many and they work in different ways. As I say above, GPs are not best suited to treating MH problems beyond mild/moderate depression. A psychiatrist will have a muh better understanding of what meds might help.

Do your children get DLA? And if so, do you get carers allowance? If so you are allowed to be on income support rather than jsa.

Op please pm me I can help you fill in a dla form and if you get middle rate care as another poster said you would be eligible for carers allowance and income support.
I am so sorry you are having such a hard time, my dd has sn it is very hard work.

No I don't get carers allowance or DLA although I did get told once I should fill in the forms for DD. I looked at the form and it was really difficult, if I can't even manage job application forms at the moment, how will I get through all that? I also have actually got a learning disability which doesn't make it easy anyway but I don't tell anyone about it usually because it makes them think I am stupid which isn't true but then they are even less likely to believe anything I say.

I'm meant to be at the jobcentre in 20 minutes to sign on but it looks like I won't be going anyway. There really is no point as I haven't done any of the requirements this fortnight. Plus at the moment I have one kid rolling around on the floor refusing to put any clothes on and another kid that has been crying constantly all morning because they want to go to school (summer holidays have started here already) I have given up on even trying now, just going to find a way to live on less money instead.

Squirkle whereabouts do you live I would be happy to help you we the forms if you are local could meet you in a library or somewhere. The forms can be very daunting but it is worth it. The cereba guide ( google it) is helpful if you could ask a friend to help you. Alternatively the cab help with dla forms.
I hope you can make it to the job centre do you have to prove you have done as they asked?

Do book an appointment with your CAB for help with form filling in. Or a helpful health visitor even? As others say if you are entitled to DLA and income support and carer's allowance that is more than JSA and may relieve stress for you for now.