Can't / Don't know how to ask for help!

[thehorsedentist]

I have been depressed for many years since my late teens but haven't felt willing to seek proper help, other than a small amount of counselling which was an awful experience. I instead coped by excessive exercise and waiting for the dark days to pass over.

I started to become depressed again in the last trimester of my pregnancy and it has gradually got worse in the 9 months since I had my son. I have hidden this from doctors/ HV's as im too ashamed to admit that i'm not ok.

My exercising is not working anymore and have begun binge eating and i'm so scared that I will become Bulimic again. I can't sleep. I'm so tired and I'm letting my baby down massively.

I do not have a good relationship with my doctor due to him misdiagnosing two (unrelated) problems. I feel that I can't trust him and i am being judged as a hypochondriac.

I have reached the end of what I can cope with but have no where to turn. Help me please.

Coul you try your HV if you can't approach your GP? Or a different GP?

I just end up lying whenever I see my HV. I can't stop myself but I just feel so ashamed.

I should imagine there are thousands and thousands of people like you, who see the doctor every year.

I try, [dont always succeed], to realise that doctors see all sorts of situations, and all sorts of people, day in, day out, day in, day out..
That is what they are there for.
I also remember an Irish poster on MN who says that if we all had to pay for it, unlike Britain, that we would act differently.

Try to go and see a different GP at the practice.
When my kids were younger, and I had to take them to a GP, I used to choose a different GP for whatever was wrong with them.
GPs are people, and some are better at one things and some another.

Can you write a note? A very simple note saying "I am struggling and need help" and hand it to your GP or HV.

It can be very difficult to vocalize your feelings. You can fear that if you say it, it will come out wrong or that once you start talking, you will not be able to stop. It's a hard conversation for you to start, so give them the note. They will understand.