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Mental health

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I'd really like to talk with some people who don't categorise their afflictive mental states as "illness" or "chemical imbalance", if you're here.

52 replies

working9while5 · 05/06/2013 17:25

Nervous about this because what's in a name, hey? But it's something I increasingly feel strongly about.

I will not for one second dispute that when I was in the depths, it felt worse than any physical illness I've ever had in my entire life. I can read "I had a Black Dog" and I recognise it all and then some.

I just don't think I was ill or that it was caused by a chemical imbalance. I think that my brain was chemically imbalanced in that state because I was dwelling so much in the regions of the brain that store dark thoughts and memories that my brain was bathed in those neurotransmitters. I have no doubt if you hooked me up to a machine my brain would have looked all depressed. I also needed - and need - medication.

My experiences relate to my father's severe alcoholism and watching a man who was once really charismatic, caring and inspiring become an abusive good-for-nothing screaming drunk, my mother's absent presence, being raped in university and other such events which sucked all my faith in the future out of my life bit by bit. I think I just had no skills to support me in not spending my entire life in my head rather than with my feet on the ground and the whole thing short-circuited when I was pregnant and lacked the meagre resources I'd been using to keep it all at bay. I think I had learned to relate events in ways that predicted catastrophic outcomes through virtue of experience.

I've had a year and a half of weekly therapy, groups, psychiatrists, CPNs etc and I just feel so pissed off that this journey and its pain and where its brought me is categorised as being the same as diabetes or a broken leg when for me, it was a product of my life... and not only my life but what other people brought into it.

It just seems to me that the emphasis on the medical model in relation to this is sometimes just another sanitisation and another way of shutting up those who have been abused. I appreciate it's great that people get sick pay and I know it certainly manifests as illness so perhaps it is semantics.

yet when I went to the supervisor of midwives to tell her I'd had a dissociative state during my first forceps birth because of the rape, she said that she wouldn't want any of her staff to know this because it wouldn't be appropriate but it was fine to write OCD/Depression all over everything. The implication to me is that the causes of depression are still pushed into the category of "deeply shameful".... but in that case it wasn't the OCD or depression that was creating my fear, it was a bodily memory that had been triggered. Categorising this as illness just seems to me to be a way of making it be something intrinsic to my brain rather than something arising from human experience of suffering.

Does anyone else feel this way? I think I had a particularly medical model type of team which didn't help - there was constant reference to how ill I was and how I needed to recuperate and how disordered my thinking was and every time I tried to say, I don't think this is illness, I think this is about something that happened and a fear of similar trauma happening again, it was put in a box like "you MUST accept this is illness". I was never disputing I needed meds or therapy... I just didn't find the metaphor of chemical imbalance helpful. I had enough suffering because of what happened, I certainly didn't want that bastard to be responsible for my fricking brain chemistry!

OP posts:
BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte · 10/06/2013 22:01

On the other hand, the drawback of declining to define oneself as "ill" or "unwell" can be very isolating. I've noticed both on the MH board here and on other support sites that people who post by simply saying that "my depression is really bad today" get far more support than people who really describe how bad they're feeling and why. I think it's the same in RL, and reflects the discomfort many people have with talking about mental/emotional experiences. When I tell people I don't know that I'm having a "bad day", they'll rarely understand the half of it. It's only when I tell close friends about a "bad day" that they'll understand that for me a "bad day" can mean what they might regard as really, realllllllllllly bad.

And I think the OP's situation describes it well - the MWs were OK with knowing that she had "OCD" but couldn't cope with dissociation or trauma. Mental illness can be neatly packaged away as something which happens to other people. Frightening thoughts and difficult feelings and terrifying memories are things which many people without MH diagnoses sometimes experience and which most people will at some point in their lifetime experience - and for some people, that prospect is unacceptably uncomfortable.

DiaryOfAWimpyMum · 12/06/2013 10:03

I think my MH issues have been caused by life experiences. I was first depressed at 18 when my Grandad died, I couldn't get over it as one normally does.

Then I married my and it went downhill from there still depressed, then the anxiety kicked in when I was maybe 30 yrs old, the I split with ex and the PTSD arrived, insomnia, now possible Bipolar 1.

I asked my Doctor how I could suddenly have or be (sorry don't know the term yet) Bipolar at this age?

He answered: Stress

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