Fluoxetine for a year, I feel no better

[GlaikitFizzog]

I had a thread in chat yesterday that went very badly wrong and mnhq have deleted it for me.

One outcome of it though, is I've realised I don't think I am any further forward with my PND than I was last January when I first sought help from the GP. I have been on 20mg of fluoxetine since February last year. And to start with I thought they were helping, placebo effect maybe, realising I wasn't actually crazy might answer that, but I still have deep downs every so often where I feel I am right back where I started.

I've kept a diary of sorts charting my ups and downs and they seem to fit in with my cycle, not every month, but when ever I have recorded a down, the same week I've got my period. Could the two be linked?

Yesterday's self pitting streak has coincided with AF arriving today.

I am going to go back to my GP, the last time I saw her she was speaking about weaning me off them, which frankly terrifies me. If this is how I feel on them what would I be like off them?

I need to get myself better for ds, he is almost 2 and is beginning to become a bit of a challenge, I am not strong enough mentally right now to cope with that and I don't want to become a shouty smacking mum (I have never raised a hand to him and never would).

Dh I don't think quite understands, I try talking to him and he listens, but he I think he thinks, pills = cure and what else can I do if they don't work. He is supportive, he does more than his fair share of things round the house. Takes care of ds no problem, is as hands on as you can get. He does all this whilst working full time in a high pressure job with no complaints. I work part time and it is my saving grace, I get to be the old me 3 days a week.

I'm not really sure what I want from this thread, maybe just somewhere to write down how I'm feeling. Maybe chat with others who have been there, are there and understand.

I have no advice for you but was on that thread last night and was horrified at the attitude of that poster.Glad to see you came back,wouldnt have blamed you if you hadnt.
Did you read the posters that came on to support you before the thread got deleted,you werent alone in being upset at the way the thread progressed,just some have to kick out for the sake of it,dont let them get you down.

I did chantan, I also had some lovely pms too. I asked for it to be deleted, because it kept getting bumped and new posters were posting. I just am not strong enough to deal with it all again today.

I've been on here for 3 years, it will take more than that to turn me away :)

Thank you

Hello love

I'm another one who goes crazy the week/days before my cycle. If I ever find myself in the deepest, darkest place mentally I go check where I am in my cycle. If it's close, then that makes how I feel no better, but I know that some of it will lift in a few days.

This may not be useful to you but there are two things I've found that help. I have a good friend who is a naturopathic physician, and she says they were taught that PMT - hang on, I want to get this right so I don't misquote her - either is a very inflammatory time or exacerbates any inflammatory conditions that we have. She also says it hits you where you're weakest. For both of us that seems to be our poor brains!
Her advice was that changing how you eat during PMT makes a huge difference, so she told me if I could lay off sugar and alcohol, and eat mostly fruit, veg and lean protein, it would help.
I was like "fuck nooooooooo, wine and cake are keeping me alive!!!!!" but was willing to try it, and bloody hell she was right. Ice taken it one step further and when my mood starts to go to shit have started taking one extra-strength ibuprofen liquitab every four hours. Figuring it's an anti inflammatory, let it do its job.

The first cycle I thought it might have been a coincidence, but after that, nope, sure enough, it helped.
Disclaimer: just my experience.

Also, as we've talked about already, I'd ask for different meds rather than discontinuing. Sertraline, citalopram, whatever else GP thinks.

Just vent here. Better out than in ((((((HIG)))))

Thanks jacks

Have you had any counseling or therapy glaikit? When you say that working is your saving grace and you get 'to be the old you' three days a week, that sounds very heartfelt, and as if you feel quite a sense of loss maybe about the changes since you had your ds. I am on maternity leave at the moment and am really looking forward to going back to work so I can understand that. (I'm also struggling with pnd after a really awful pregnancy.)

If you've been on the fluoxetine for a year and you don't feel significantly different, I'd be tempted to come off it to be honest. And whether you stay on it or not, it sounds like a different approach might be worth a try as well. For complicated reasons I can't take anti-depressants so am waiting to be assessed by the psych services here; but meanwhile I've been referred for some mother-baby therapy which is helping already.

I haven't had any counselling, its not something that's been offered to me, but I think I can sign up through my works Medicare plan. I'll look into it, but I'm wary about bringing work into it.

I'm making an appointment to see the GP to talk over my ads. I'm making a plan. I like plans, they don't always go the way I think they will, but I like them anyway.

Could you try a different anti d? I was on fluoxetine for a short time in my early twenties and it made me feel a hundred times worse. Went on to mirtzapine sp? And slowly got better. I don't think I should ever have been put on fluoxetine as Prozac in the under 25's isn't recommended. I can't remember why though. Of course I don't know how old you are sorry. Sorry for rambling I'm tired. I hope you feel better soon x

I'm 31, don't be sorry! I didn't know that about the under 25s. I'm calling the surgery in 30 minutes.

Hope it went well glakit. One size does t fit all when it comes to anti ds so hopefully the gp can find something that suits you better. If you can access counselling as well. I always found that Counselling and ads helped me better than just one or the other.

Did you manage to get an appointment?

6.30 tonight, not with my usual GP, as she is on holiday, but I have spoken to the one before.

Great,let us know how it goes.

Yes please update!
xx and fingers crossed.

I'm back. GP was lovely, we talked a bit about how am feeling and why I feel like that. He read through my notes and said that my GP had noted my pnd seemed to come from me mourning my life from before. Before ds, before we moved from our home town to where we are, before dh. I didn't know she had made that observation or if she did mention it, I've forgotten.

I went through a typical week, Mondays and fridays at home with ds tue weds thurs at work, my choir, coffee with friends, what I do for exercise. I mentioned my weight and he pressed. Bit more about it asking how big a problem I see it. And I see it as a massive problem (pardon the pun), he said it is difficult to tackle something like your weight when feeling depressed, because usually the crutch you go to for comfort is food, which is totally true. I know trying to diet just now is doomed to fail.

I started a couch to 5k so I can run a 5k with the woolly huggers in July. But I had an accident with a pair of completely unsuitable shoes and did the ligaments in my foot, so I've had to knock that on the head for now until I can actually get my trainers on.

Doc said because he doesn't "know" me well enough, he doesn't want to change my meds just now, but has given me details of the NHS telephone counselling service so I will look that up to see if its for me and referral to the mental health team could take up to 6 months.

So I don't think I'm miraculously cured, but I'll give the telephone counselling a go, see where I get with that.

I'll keep posting here if that's ok. I'm going to try and chart my moods better, to see if there is any pattern I am missing, but I'm sure they relate to my cycle.

How are you today? How do you feel about the appointment today?

I'm a bit disappointed that this GP didn't want to try different meds... I'd have thought a year of one drug without noticeable results would be enough of a fair trial.

Here's hoping for a swift referral to Mental Health.

Hi, I'm on my lunch so this will be quick! It's protocol in my surgery that if there is to be any changes in meds the original prescribing GP needs to be consulted. I'm a bit hacked off because I have been sending in monthly D&A questionnaires but none have been logged on the system. So doc had nothing to go on.

Things have been ok since Monday, I've been busy at work so that has kept my mind occupied. I am 100% certain it's to do with my cycle. I started feeling rubbish Friday last week, AF arrived Saturday during the shitstorm of that thread, Sunday was hell, then Monday still a bit down, Tuesday I would have said I felt normal (whatever that is).

I have a girly weekend with my BF this weekend, so that's something to look forward to. Jacks I think you and she would get on well, she is a yoga bunny, holistic crystal wearing, gong bathing "stinking hippy" her word not mine, she smells like patchouli and cinnamon!

Ummm... if you delete everything after "yoga bunny", I think you'd be right :o
I might wear the odd crystal bracelet but I loathe patchouli and am the furthest thing from a hippy you could imagine :o. Cinnamon, on the other hand... if it's coming from cinnamon buns...

What's gong bathing??

Anyway, I suppose that's a good policy re consulting the original prescribing doctor, but not logging your forms... That's shit.

Ah well, she is really into her yoga, that's her main thing! She believes it fixes everything, maybe I should give it a go! She already has me carrying around a piece of rosé quartz and tigers eye in my bra!

The other things aren't as big in her life. Gong bathing is where you lie down and a gong is bashed at regular intervals until all your senses kind of shut down. It's meant to be a way to achieving a higher level of consciousness. All this is totally opposite to her working life where she is high up in elf and safety!! Anyway, I love her to bits!
I've emailed my practice manager at the health centre to try to find out what has happened to my forms, but I'm not holding out much hope tbh.

Choir tonight! That always makes me feel good. And my working week is over! Yay!

This yoga bunny has a tummy ache today. And PMT. I feel like I've been hit over the head with a bad mood.

Sorry - I hit post too soon, meant to ask how you're doing?

I'm good, had a very relaxing spa day yesterday and lovely food. My therapist did a bit f reiki on me because I was asking questions about it. So I think I'm going to go have a full session. I need to start looking after myself better, not just body wise with exercise but in mind too. My friend is a great sounding board for working though my thoughts on all that. Dh thinks its all a load of rubbish, how can carrying a couple of rocks around in yr bra help? Tbh I don't know how or even if they they help, but right now, if there is a chance of something "a bit kooky" helping me I'm willing to give it a go.

More snow here, I'm getting a bit fed up of it now tbh. Spring can start now please!