Can someone distract me whilst I have a panic attack :(

[BloominMarvellous]

I suffer with depression and anxiety and PTSD (I am having EMDR therapy for the PTSD).

Things lately have been building up and getting worse. I am taking Fluoxetine (40mg) and Propanalol (80mg).

At xmas my contract at work ended and I have struggled to find a job and it is crunch time now. If I cannot find a job in the next few weeks we need to think about giving up the house. We are in debt but I am thinking about possibly getting into more just to keep a roof over my head.

Anyway, all of this has knocked my confidence in my ability to do anything.

Today it has all got to me. I can feel my heart wanting to break out of my chest. I feel sick. I feel nervous as though something bad is going to happen. I feel scared. I know it is leading to a panic attack and as I am alone I needed to get it out on here and try to distract myself from these feelings.

I have lost the will to carry on. I am feeling beaten. I have had enough. I feel like I am being punished for being in a violent relationship and getting away. Ever since then I haven't been able secure a job. They have all been temporary which leaves me stuck when it ends.

I hate myself for not making better choices two years ago. I hate myself for being in that relationship as it seems to have ruined my life. I just want to move on.

I am sorry if this doesn't make any sense. I just needed to get it all out.

TV, radio, go for a walk.
Much much harder to have a panic attack if there is something to concentrate on.

I don't know your interests, but a pod cast on something that interests you.

I used to spend hours listing to the world service in the dead of night.

I also used to swear very loudly at them and explain to them that since they had no medical cause blinding panic induced migraines could Fuck the fuck off!

I really hope you feel better soon.

Pod casts are a great idea. I used to listen to them a lot but sort of forgot about them. Thank you.

I hate the heart palpitations most. It physically hurts and feels like my heart will break out of my chest

I used to do my times tables, very slowly. Or think of lists of girls' names beginning with A - Z, boys' names.

Oh no, this is awful. Panic attacks are hell to deak with. Mine used to wake me up - I'd think, wow, what's that loud banging noise? Then realise it was my heart.

The propranalol didn't work for me, also didn't work for some others I know. I found that sertraline (anti-depressant) finally saw the buggers off.

I know it's hard, but deep, slow breathing can calm things down while you wait for the storm to pass. And avoid caffeine etc? Sorry, I wish I could just wave a magic wand and banish panic attacks from existence. They fucking suck. Hope you get better very soon x.

Thank you Morris I called a friend and had a good rant and she said I can go to hers later on. That will help a lot.

I think I will go for a walk too. The snow has all gone now so I don't need to worry about breaking my neck.

Have you not been given anything to cope withe the panic attack?

I have sheets of paper, I have to write down on a scale of 1-100 my panic, then I write the situation, then visualise my safe place, what can I do to help the panic and whether the panic is really a panic or me building something up inot a panic (it usually is)!

Good luck with your EMDR I'm having CBT for the same. I have yet to fill in one of my sheets,the idea seems to be good though

Remind yourself that this is a flashback; it is a response to an abnormal situation. Remind yourself that you are safe.

Think of what makes you feel safe, secure and either do this or visualize it. This could be a place or even your bed or bath or garden.

Remind yourself that you have been through this before and you can deal with it no matter how bad it may feel at present.

Distract yourself with doing something - reading , music, or better still (as you've done) speak to somebody you trust or get out and get some fresh air.

You are not being punished. Your mind is rationalising what happened and why you stayed, and trying to digest and learn. Nobody deserves to be in a violent relationship or any form of abusive relationship. You realised you had made a bad choice and you are moving forward.

Be gentle with yourself. It will take time to heal but the important thing is that you are.