It's far far worse than I ever thought. I knew it was bad but I just figured it'd get better. I'm snappy, I'm impatient, I fuss over everything and I get snappy when things don't go exactly to plan, when my DCs don't jump to attention every time I click and when they don't move fast enough. I shout, I say horrible things.
I'm so scared I will lose them. I love them so much.
BF (who broke up with me on Xmas day) just text this
"I've had enough, and who wouldn't! Watched on in disbelief as u ripped into those poor kids for little or no reason. (at least I know now It's not just me) difference is though, the kids can't just walk away....."
I want to commit suicide. I know they are better off without me but where would they go? DD has no dad and is so shy with strangers. I know its not the answer. But what is?