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Original poster

pnd sucks big time

14 replies

fransmom · 07/04/2006 22:58

i'm having a really up and down day today, i was ok-ish earlier (the best i can hope for at the moment) and now i can't, i feeling really really down and i can't talk to dp about it either. i don't know how to start, i just feel like crying all the time. we went shopping at local somerfield earlier (after being at his dad's)and he parked in disabled space and wouldn't move down, even though there were m+b spaces cos it was near closing time. i nearly cried in there

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Ledodgy · 07/04/2006 23:00

Fransmom speak to your HV or GP about it and nip it in the bud now before it gets worse.

Original poster
fransmom · 07/04/2006 23:03

can't do anything til monday and i'm at work then. Sadhave day off tuesday, will have to hijack dd's time at babyclinic i think to get in and see her. i have left msgs on their ansa-phone before and they never checked them on the monday - is i tjust me or is that unprofessional?

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Original poster
fransmom · 07/04/2006 23:10

he's being a git tonight. he just gone to bed saying a terse goodnight and no kiss like normal, well he should bloody well listen to me, them naybe i woldn't spend so much time on mn

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Ledodgy · 07/04/2006 23:27

I'm sorry you're feeling this way and aren't getting any suport form your dp ring your gp's on Monday and book an appointment for tuesday or ring tuesday morning if it's like my gp's it well help honest. They can arrange counselling/medication for you. Just remember what you are feeling is normal it can happen and you will get better.

Ledodgy · 07/04/2006 23:30

*support sorry for typos have had wine.

Ledodgy · 07/04/2006 23:30

How old is your baby?

Olihan · 07/04/2006 23:37

Please please see your GP. I was feeling like you a few months ago, relationship with DH seriously rocky. Finally phoned HV who made me appointment with GP who took bloods to be on the safe side and it wasn't PND but low thyroid which causes the same symptoms. Started on thyroxine that day and was back to normal within a week. I'm not saying that's definitely what it is but my dd was 19 weeks at the time and GP said it can be triggered by pregnancy. I'm sorry if this is totally irrelevant but I thought it's something worth knowing about. At least rule out anything other than PND. TBH, just telling someone else who knew how to help made a big difference and you don't have to go down the whole antidepressants route, my Hv had loads of suggestions of things that help.

Original poster
fransmom · 08/04/2006 15:21

ledodgy dd is nearly 1- well in 2 and 1/2 weeks anyway. i can't believe it's come so fast.

olihan, i had some bloods done a while ago but silly nurse didn't do thyroid which i had requested by doc2. the doc i was seeing is on holiday til the end of april, lucky for some but he's a doc ain't he?!

i am planning to go and see the hv on tuesday, in the middle of babyclinic(!) so will probably have to hijack dd's turn. hv is pretty good though, well the one i'm hoping to see is, not sure about the other one (they take it in turns). am dreading it tbh, but i know i need to do something as relationship with dp is v.rocky and sometimes i don't feel as though i can bond with dd. i'm not feeling too bad today, though i went into town specifically for farmer's market (which was rubbish)- no veggies for dd; and to pay leccy bill and part of phone bill - dp had given me his bank card to pay them with, as he pays the main bills and pay for food. anyway, i was halfway to the bus stop and i'd forgotten the leccy card and phone card!!!!!!!! i couldn't be bothered to go back and get them.

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Olihan · 08/04/2006 15:42

Hv's are pretty good with anything that might remotely be PND. I had quite a low opinion of mine until I rang her in tears one afternoon and she came to visit me the next morning and spent over an hour just listening to me. TBH that helped as much as anything, just admitting i felt shitty and wasn't entirely convinced I wanted to be a mum!
The other thing that really really helped, and my DH literally forcd me into it, was sending the kids to my in laws for 4 days. I didn't realise just how draining it is being a SAHM to a 4 month old and a 2.1 year old. I so didn't want them to go and cried all the way home after dropping them off but it made such a difference to how I coped when they came back, even though the thyroxine hadn't kicked in. Don't know if you've got anyone you trust enough to have your dd but even 24 hours where you don't have to do anything at all but rest, will help a tiny bit.
Also (sorry to go on), my Hv gave me a self help thing called The Overcoming Depression workbook which tries to change your thinking and behaviour - may be helpful if you don't fancy the anti d route.
Hope this helps

Original poster
fransmom · 08/04/2006 15:49

thanx x

i feel like i been on duty since 7.15 yesterday morning, so i told dp last night that as soon as he's home satday, he's on duty! just hope it works that way.

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Olihan · 08/04/2006 16:48

try going out for a couple of hours. It's too easy to end up doing things because it's easier than watching them do it! Leave him with your dd and take yourself off to a friends or just to the shops, anywhere you can relax a bit.

Original poster
fransmom · 11/04/2006 16:54

well, it didn't work that way did it?. i had half an hour and then i had to force him to do that. told him i wanted to go see hv tuesday(today), and he wanted to go with me.

today, wasn't feeling too bad. got up early(ish) lo managed to sleep until 8ish, (about time she learned to tell time for lie-in! - only joking tho!!!!!!) looked at photo's of dd to cheer myself up even more, went for shower using fave body stuff, it felt like i was putting on armour to protect myself. i was ready and getting lo dressed when the phone went. his bloody ex w - can we talk? all he said was no, negative. not don't bother me ever again you sad cow. she's always interfering never leaving us alone (which i would do, if he left ages ago) ffs they been divorced two, nearly3 years, have no ties at all, she's been maried again and had affairs - why can't she bloody well leave us alone!

suffice to say, after one huge almighty row, with me screaming and shouting some home truths at him, it was too late to see hv. so i phoned them (and spoke to the one hv i didn't want) - the upshot of it being that there is sweet f.a. for pnd moms in my area, the only place is a mental health unit which will only assess you to see if there is danger of you killing yourself (there wasn't, so they sent me away with some leaflets to basically sort it out myself!). i was speaking to hv on phone and she was asking me if i managed to get out of the house - i need someone to talk to that can counsel me, with exp of pnd, i don't think she has any real understanding of pnd at all Sad she can't come to house til 21st (!) and i won't be able to get time off work.

i did see on another post/thread about national childbirth trust and possibly pnd counselling, but don't know how to contact them Sad

htf do i get through all this s**t now?

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Original poster
fransmom · 20/04/2006 21:43

hv came to house this morning, when i'm feeling rotten, and rather sweetly announced she can't make the appointment and has rearranged for the first week in may!!!!!!!!!! AngrySad wtf am i sposed to do? she was sposed to come round and help with pnd and she bloody well cancels. sorry postpones. how come some of the ladies on here have hv who come round at drop of hat, and i have to wait for mine for three bloody weeks? Sad

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Original poster
fransmom · 04/05/2006 22:30

bump bump bump

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