Alcoholic family member

[weebuns]

What advise can you give to me. My sister in law is an alcoholic, something she has admitted to in the last nine mths and we've known for longer than that. She has blamed a stressful job, as a nurse in a streessful but has recently changed to a less demanding role, 2 weeks into it she has rang in sick twice due to the drink. She continues to sneak the drink and tends to go on 2 day binges from what we know. I fear for health, her parents and husbands sanity and for the safety of the patients under her care. It's like she is in self destruct. She has contacted AA and has been speaking to one person a couple of times during her binges when she claims she wants to die etc. how can we help her before she ends up in hospital or jail?

You cant.
Sorry but you cant do anything to help her. (Bitter experience)

You can help yourself and her family by contacting ALANON, this is a service available for families and loved ones of alcoholics. They are brilliant. Just Google it, or some one will come here with a link for you.

I completely agree with nosleepwithworry.

ALANON is the best place for you.

AA is the best place for your SIL, however, you cannot expect her to do anything, no matter how much she says she will.

Alcoholism is just awful for those around the alcoholic - and they have no idea, and, horrible though it is to say, they don't care. I'm so sorry for what you and your family are going through. It's horrid.

We thought my Mum, after she broke her neck, would give up the drink. 10 years later she's still a drunk. Nothing we can do or did prevented her from that accident or from drinking. I'm sorry.

This is such a tough situation weebuns - it's horrible for all the family, and for your SIL too. She doesn't want to be an addict and feel that she wants to die. Nobody wants those feelings. AA is a very good idea, and I might also suggest this book: www.amazon.co.uk/Easyway-Control-Alcohol-Allen-Carr/dp/1848374658/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1344353853&sr=8-1.

I really don't want to sound flippant or suggest all these problems can be solved by her reading a book, but speaking from experience I can say this has helped a few people I know think about why they abuse alcohol and what they can do to change it.

Agree that Al-Anon can really make a difference to families. The national helpline is 020-74030888 who will put you in touch with a local member and give details of local meetings.

I know both recovered and continuing addicts (to both drugs and alcohol) and unfortunately I would echo the posters above: in all the cases I know, the reformed addicts eventually got help for themselves when they thought "sod this, I can't do this for much longer".

The continuing addicts are not at that stage, and to be honest I don't know if they ever will be. Some people just have a bit more fight in them than other people, I think.

One thing is for certain though - people have to want to change, and if they don't they just won't. I say this because I understand where you are coming from, OP - like most decent human beings, you just want to help, but here you just can't. She has to do it for herself..

Wishing you the best, OP.