How do you control your inner Lolita?

[Whirliwig72]

By that I mean the little voice inside that constantly witters away pouring doubt and anxiety on everything. I call mine Lolita! Mine only really goes away if I have a drink which of course is not a healthy option on a regular basis (I've been pretty much tee-total for 4 yrs but was a big drinker prior to having children.

I'm so tired of feeling snappy, nervy and knackered (ds2 not anywhere near sleeping through which does not help) :( When I do feel calm and Lolita free it's soooo wonderful but it happens so seldom that I find it hard to hold on to and tether that feeling down.

Mmm, a most unappealing title for a post..I thought it was a troll paedophile !!

Sorry...why don't you re-post with a new title and then I'm sure you'll get more responses.

I'm very bad at controlling mine

I don't yet... I live in hope I will learn how to...

Yes the paedophile association was the first thing I thought of!

Yes I see your point - I call her Lolita cos in my imagination mine has a Spanish accent and stands hand on hip criticising everything I do. Maybe I should call her Mavis instead

How about Norris (if you watch Corrie) lol?

Yeah, I thought this was going to be all about getting into inappropriate relationships, too :o which my answer would be: I am involved with someone I care about deeply, and know that I have the choice of being with him on the terms of monogamy, or not having him in my life. I choose him, so it's monogamy

Flylady helped with "stinking thinking " (her term for inner Lolita/warped thoughts) when I read her a few years back. I've been doing Mood Gym which is kinda helping in identifying the thoughts as unhelpful criticism, but I haven't got my head around the "unravelling warped thoughts" module yet. It does look promising, however!

Moodgym is fantastic.

I have an inner mother - think Rose West but with more of an attitude problem.

I have learned to redirect myself when I notice that I am upsetting / getting myself angry through all the shit I am thinking, have managed to claw back a bit of self esteem, and though it sounds daft, yoga and meditation have help me massively.

Get this, read it and follow what it says, it is lifechanging.

Have learned to live along side mine...and even manage to boss it around sometimes

Have just ordered the book...thanks for the recommendation! X x

Wonderful recommendations thank you all so much! Do you think the nagging voice pf doom inside is predominately a female thing - I've never come across a bloke who understands this phenomenon! My Mavis as she has now been renamed was on too form today! She always has a good go before I take the children out in the car. I'm a perfectly good driver but she always convinces me I'm gong be involved in a massive crash every journey so instead of enjoying driving I sit behind the wheel feeling like I'm on death row for most of it!

Lolita, meet Bart; Bart, Lolita.

Now go play together so the grown ups can get on with their lives.

Hi Bart!