Anxiety- Health related

[ScoobyDoo2012]

I have a history of anxiety which has remained controlled - Had CBT and was fine. However, I have recently come off a medication (accutane aka roaccutane) used for treating skin conditions. It's really strong and I began to hallucinate (a shadow of a wolf running across the road, a rug jumping in my face and my road sign turned into a person). I was also getting weird sensations in my eyes, like they were jumping side to side occasionally.

So, I came of the meds immediately. All has been ok since I did, which was about 2 weeks ago. However yesterday, I think I had another hallucination, a grey shape flying. I had the strange eye sensation since and now I have convinced myself i have a brain tumour.

I feel sick with worry, I've been "googling" brain tumours and cannot think of any explanation as to why this has happened now I have stopped the medication. Because Monday and Tuesday are bank holidays, I can't even see a doctor until at least Wednesday and will spend all day and night from now until then panicking.

I guess I'm really looking for someone to give me a rational reply that can perhaps calm me?! I'm trying to think of all the CBT methods, but this time the anxiety is a direct result of an unrelated thing. Oh god, I am just winding myself up, hope someone can talk some sense into me :(

Sorry you feel like this scooby. I cant relate to that, but i have recently come off citalopram, and it is like half my brain just dropped out of my head! I went to the shop to buy a loaf of bread this morning, got home and realised i had bought a new one yesturday! This is the same shop i went into last week asking if i'd left my cheese on the counter, CCTV showed i hadn't even picked up any cheese!
I understand how worrying it can be. Im not sure about hallucinations in conjunction with brain tumors, but i think that the meds getting out of your system is the most likely cause.

Hi thanks for your reply! I am just sat here crying it's so frustrating as I have been doing so well. But I'm also scared thinking what if I'm shrugging it off as anxiety and it really is worse. I'm trying to find information on how long accutane takes to clear the system but no luck so far. I have read that before prescribing, dermatologist should ask about mental health problems but mine never did.

I can feel myself slipping into the throws of anxiety, looking next to me feeling anxious about my phone charging and emitting radiation... Sounds ridiculous I know.

I wish it wasn't fucking jubilee weekend so I could at least relax knowing i could speak to a doctor tomorrow.

Having done a quick research it seems that the stuff stays in your system for a while as it is stipulated that you MUST NOT get pregnant within a month of stopping it. So it could still be side effects. Best ask your doctor. And stop googling. Most symptoms of a brain tumour are also symptoms of lots of other things like bugs and migraines.

Thank you madhouse that is a really good point!! Maybe it is still in my system, I assumed as soon as I stopped so would these side effects. That has relaxed me a little thank you

I promise you haven't got a brain tumour. If I'm wrong track me down! I have severe anxiety and every now and again I convince myself it's a brain tumour - it's very common for people with anxiety to worry about brain tumours. I was on accutane many moons ago. Horrible stuff! X

Thank you :) I feel like if I tell myself i don't, I'm tempting fate... It's just strange how yesterday I had a 'relapse' into my accutane symptoms, also had a mini nose bleed which I haven't had since 2 months into the treatment. I really resented stopping it early because of the hallucinations but I'm now relieved. I hate anxiety!!!

Anxiety is a living hell. I wish it would f**k right off! I bet you it's the accutane. Madmouse is right though - it takes a long time to get out of your system. I remember having to sign declarations that I wouldn't get pregnant whilst on it and after.

hows things now scooby?

anxiety is totally shit isnt it?

as always madmouse is right about meds still being in the system

also remeber as an anxious person we tend to over drive thoughts if we just feel slightly out of kilter

I've caved, am waiting for NHS direct to call me back, slightly concerned that they have put me straight to the top of the queue. She asked if I have had numbness in my face and I don't know if I'm being completely paranoid or if I did a few days ago I certainly remember a strange feeling. I feel like I am going mad and imagining symptoms now!

They have put you as priority because of your mental health not your physical condition. Even if it was a brain tumour that would not be an emergency weirdly enough as tumours don't change overnight. It's about the anxiety.

She did say "I can tell you're worried and rightly so"... :S She couldn't find any information on how long it takes to be out your system so has passed my case on to local out of hours who will call me shortly, apparently. I am sat here snowballing! I expected her to just tell me to contact my gp on wednesday I guess

OK so she thinks it may have something to do with the meds. Hope they ring back soon. Occupy yourself in the meantime. Drink tea, clean something, do a cross word.

Bless you. At least you don't phone repeated ambulances like me

Fuck but anxiety is awful.
I'm on Citalopram and attempted to just come off it. I hallucinated fire, it was horrible.
I am 100% sure you don't have a brain tumour. I hope they call back soon and put your mind at rest.

They sent me to a&e, they said they could hear how worried I was and to go to a&e, but I was waiting hours and the doctor took 2 minutes to tell me my eyes seem fine but to go to my doctor on Wednesday for the "neurological" aspect... Apparently what I have had isn't hallucinations as much as visual disturbances. Urrrgh just hope the next 2 days go quickly. Tizzylizzy I can totally sympathise, when I had my first panic attack I rushed to hospital convinced my throat was closing and I was going to die. Bad times.

Yes visual disturbances are also side effects of the stuff, came across that yesterday. I'm sure you'll be ok x

Oh hun. Hope you're feeling better this morning.

So lovely for people who understand to talk to me... In "real" life people just find my anxiety frustrating and can't understand why I am like this, the most common thing I hear is "There's nothing you can do about it, it's out of your control, so there's no point worrying". That has always been completely lost on me... The fact it is out of my control makes me worry more!! When I had CBT I was told by looking on the internet at symptoms etc I am trying to gain control and I have to stop and tolerate the anxiety. Has anyone else been medicated for anxiety? It is something i have always been refused, being told it simply masks the problem. But I have had CBT, I know the techniques and in general it's under control. At time likes this, I just wish they would give me something to calm me down a bit.

Yes, holding some everyday anxiety is something I learned from my psychologist too. And learned to ask the question 'What evidence do I have that this will actually happen?'

Medicating anxiety is quite common, mostly with anti-depressants rather than calming medication which is without exception short working and severely addictive.

i take citalopram as it dampens anxiety as well as tackling depression
someone who has never had anxiety or a panic attack can never truly understand how horrid and debilitating they are,but i guess the same can be said for all MH

that one great things about MN always someone around who understands and is supportive

My eyes are feeling really strange today again like I cannot focus on anything. I'm hoping if it was a tumour, it would have been found on eye examination :S I was going to "google it" but decided it wasn't a good idea.

I agree if you haven't had it its hard to understand. I felt my CBT therapist assumed I was depressed because I have anxiety and the 2 often go hand in hand but luckily I don't have depression, despite the anxiety and when it gets bad I'm usually a happy person.

I had a massive freak out a few months back that I was going blind (yes you heard that right). But I suppose I do have a kind of excuse for being so ridiculous in that I'm a type 1 diabetic. Anyhow I went for an eye examination and he said I wasn't going blind but I also happened to ask if I had a brain tumour. The optician said most certainly not as there would be bulging in the retina etc. So rest assured :) x

Oh and I've got horrendous anxiety and occasional depression when that gets too much. Determined not to go on meds and work through it with counsellor.

It's frustrating that you only get x amount of CBT/counselling before you're sent on your merry way. I still had so much more to work though. I have body dysmorphic disorder and anxiety and remember therapist saying each one required a whole course of CBT but had to split the sessions.

That reassures me about the optician, I think the guy I saw yesterday thought I was mad, he said my eyes were clear and I asked if that meant i didn't have a brain tumour. He was like (hmm) is that what you are worried about.

I also worry that when there really is something wrong with me- possibly now possibly later- they will just think I am neurotic and not consider what I'm saying, it's a catch 22 :S