Who can help?

[niniane]

An aunt of mine has mental health issues. They've been ongoing for years, she had a breakdown around 35 years ago but was generally ok until 10 years ago when she had a mastectomy for breast cancer. Over the last few years she has complained of pain left from the surgery. She has seen a number of Drs at various hospitals but says that none can help. Any treatment she has received she hasn't kept up with, any pills she has had she has taken for no longer than a few days before saying they don't work. Things have got worse over the past year. She has said she wants to die and when staying with DM said she felt psychotic and was afraid she would do her harm. She had a couple of weeks in a care home a few months ago as she said she couldn't face being at home but left after a couple of weeks. There is a lot more to it than what I've put here and there are other issues but the main problem is that no one is willing to help. Her Dr won't have her admitted to hospital as he says it's 'difficult' and just keeps changing her pills (I don't know exactly what she is on). SHe won;t change her Dr and says she won't go into hospital. This is now putting strain on my DM and another aunt and we just don't know what to do next or where to get help. Please can anyone provide any advice at all however small?

Possibly the best, if harsh, advice, I can give is that your DM and aunt need to start setting some boundaries to protect themselves. They cannot make this aunt seek help, but they have a choice not to let themselves be dragged down. So they may need to consider not letting her stay with them, only visit for set amounts of time, not taking calls at odd hours etc.

I would never under estimate the horror of severe depression as I have suffered 2 major episodes and still have intermittent depression and anxiety. Re the pain following surgery, presumably her GP has referred her to hospital on several occasions, as she has seen Drs at hospital, who haven't helped. However it may be that any meds she has been prescribed for pain relief she has not taken, nor maybe co-operated with any treatment plan.

I am a little confused about your aunt telling your mum that she "thought she was psychotic" - this means that there is a thinking disorder and sufferers are by definition out of touch with reality. This is why many sufferers of pyschotic illness need to be detained in hospital for their own safety or that of others. Sufferers are not aware that they have a problem, they think that the problem lies with others. You did say something about your aunt saying "she was going to harm her" - did you mean harming herself or your mother? Wanting to die is a symptom of severe depression but there is a difference between hoping that you don't wake in the morning, and making a plan to commit suicide.

Reading the post it does seem that there is something circular going on. Your aunt won't take any meds prescribed and she says the GP won't admit her to hospital because it is "difficult" or could it be that there is no clinical reason for admission to hospital, and your aunt is saying that she won't go into hospital in any event.

One of the problems seems to be that neither your mum nor her sister know exactly what s going on between you aunt and the GP and mental health services, because presumably they only know what your aunt tells them, and this may not be entirely truthful. I don't mean to be unkind but your aunt seems to have decided that no one can help, and jeapordises any attempt by Drs to help her.
I honestly don't know what to suggest other than your mum or another sister actually accompanies your aunt to the GP (If she will agree) so that they may be more in the picture than at present. I'm sorry I can't think of anything else.