Hello everyone I'm after some advice.
All my life I've been petrified of vomit. We don't know where it came from or why I react the way I do but it absolutley terrifies me. In the last 12 months I have been diagnosed with PND and a panic disorder. What I have very recently come to realise is that this 'panic disorder' is in fact OCD, and that the PND made my emetophobia a million times worse. At the very mention of any illness (specifically V&D type illnesses) I have palpitations and start to panic. I go into 'cleaning mode' - more so than usual - and I wash my hands every 5 mins to the point of them being red raw, bleach the house, and wash any clothes that have been worn around the ill person. I KNOW it's irrational, but try as I might, I can't stop, I can't help it. I convince myself that me and my LO are going to catch it. I get so annoyed with myself because it's such a selfish way of thinking, but I can't help it.
I get very intrusive thoughts as well that are very common with OCD sufferers, like loved ones dying, my LO getting leukaemia, or me somehow inadvertantly causing harm to my DH or my LO. I've had some CBT sessions but so far have not found them very helpful. I'm a nervous bloody wreck and it's taking over my life!!
Is there anyone out there who has been through this or similar?!
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.