pregnacy addiction?????

[churchdonna]

not sure if this is the right place to post.
my hubby & family all think im addicted to being pregnant and its got me really down because i think they may be right & i dont know what to do.
i have got three kids with a 20 month gap between them but my urge to become pregnant again starts from around 2 months & continues to get worse & worse until i get pregnant again. my youngest is 14 months now & it is at the point where i cant even be in the same room as a pregnant lady or a newborn without bursting into tears.
its starting to make me resent my hubby as he wont get intimate with me in case i get pregnant cos i cant even physically put a contraceptive in my mouth & every time i get an appointment to get the injection i just end up cancelling it.
i dont know where to turn as we cant afford another baby right now but i know this wont stop me if it carries on much longer.
any advice please

I can sympathise with this as I felt a bit like this a few years back ( I have 4 DC). IME it probably stemmed from feeling that being a mum was the only thing I seemed to do well and I found pregnancy, birth and babies a doddle tbh. It was only when DC3 was dxed SN that I realised more children would just make life harder and I have also found the juggling of everyones needs harder as the DC have got older so in retrospect I am glad I ignored the urge to constantly reproduce.

I found doing something for myself helped me identify with me as opposed to me as a mother, I started doing some ameuteur dramatics when DC4 was small which helped focus energies elsewhere. Maybe something like this would help.

It sounds cliched but try and look at what you already have. Life often has a way of throwing curve balls at us and now my children are no longer little I am grateful I didn't overstretch myself too much . The highs and hormones that come with having babies can be quite addictive for some people, but you need to think practically and find alternative fullfillment.

HTH

Just to add after re reading my post I have an eight year gap between DC1 and 2 (new relationship) and I already had DC4 by the time number 3 was dxed SN. If I hadn't I probably would have thought twice about number 4, lovely though he is. I also felt like I could afford them when they were small but the financial pressure increases with age ime.