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Trying to get on meds

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deliakate · 11/01/2012 13:56

After 3 years of childbearing/breastfeeding, I decided a few weeks ago to quit breastfeeding and get back on ADs - which I have had for most of my adult life (with some breaks).

Cue all hell breaking loose. I started on paroxetine, and that evening, I began with d&v and a high fever. We called the on call doc, who prescribed risperidone (0.5mg) to 'reverse' the effects, so I took this for 3 nights. Then on the monday I tried to start citalopram. I had one dose, and I wound up the next day in A&E with just the most overwhelming anxiety I have ever felt.

I collapsed in the waiting room with a panic attack (I have never had one before, but a very kind lady came and put her hand on my back whilst I passed out, and told me what was happening). I stayed in A&E all day convinced this was an allergic reaction to all the meds, thinking I was going to die. Really, really didn't recognise myself. I was allowed to go home as DH collected me after seeing the crisis team at about 2am. They said I was ill enough to go to hospital, but that I would do better at home. So they took me on for two weeks, and started me on an antihistamine for the anxiety (promethazine) and a new anti-depressent - called Agomelatin or Valdoxan, which works on your melatonin system.

I'm now under the community team. But I am now SO scared of meds. I have stopped the agomelatin, which I will discuss when I next see the psychiatrist. I was previously OK on citalopram, but gosh that reaction was awful. Combined with the hormonal changes caused by stopping bf abruptly cold-turkey, I really nearly lost my sanity.

I'm still suffused with adrenaline most of the day and night. Did I have a nervy b? What the hell is going on? Can anyone relate to any of this???

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