Help! I am still feeling so down. feel like no one understands

[LynseyM]

Hi, I have already posted a wee message last week. I had went to the doctors and he said I had PND. I didnt even realise. I havent been sleeping,I have been feeling guilty, crying all the time and cant even get out of bed in the morning. I feel disgusting and dint even want to put on my decent clothes.
I feel like I have been trying to concor this but nothing ids working. I was prescribed sleeping tablets so it would "Pick me up again" but now they have finished I feel just as low as I did. My partner is very loving but I feel Im letting him down and I dont think he really knows how to help me when Im upset.
I cant turn to my family cos they have enough problems going on and I dont want to burden them.
All my friends live far away and dont have kids.
The HV is coming out to see me tomorrow. I feel like such a loser. In a way I dont even want to tell her how bad things are I just want to put a front on and pretend Im ok.
I have never had depression b4 and till know could never quite understand it.
I feel really alone. Has anyone felt like this but got better in time and did you have to take medication?
I almost feel like no one wants to help. SOrry for sounding so desperate its just I want so much to get my life back on track.

Bumping this for you. Do not put a brave face on for the hv, you need help and support and she will not be in a position to provide it if she does not know how you feel. PND is something you can get through with the right support.

Hi Lynsey

You feel the way you do because thats what PND does. I was diagnosed with PND in early December.

I had a lot of the same feelings as you, and found that my normal everyday worries and concerns were over emphasised and seemed worse. I felt like i was alone, and no-one cared and couldnt be bothered or were too busy to help me.

In the end i posted on here, and got some really helpful advice and support from fellow MNers who understood how i was feeling and why. It was the best thing i ever did, and i hope that its the same for you too .

Please please talk to someone, whether its your GP, but particularly if your HV is visiting tomorrow - talk to her. Mine has been great.

I went to my GP and was prescribed AD's - Sertraline.

I have found that they have helped. I am aware that they dont suit everyone. One MNer described them to me as this: Depression is caused by a lack of serotonin in the brain. AD's help to stimulate production of that again. It can take 3-6 months to get back up to normal. Then you slowly withdraw the ADs so that your brain gradually starts to produce it on its own. Hope that made sense.

Please keep posting and talking - really helps, there are lots of understanding fabulous people on here.

HTH
xxx

Lynsey. You poor thing! I don't have PND but have some experience with depression in general. Is v hard for people to understand if they have not had the feeling (eg is way worse than just feeling "blue" or "low"). Nothing to be ashamed of either - they say that as high as 50% of the population has suffered from it! I'm surprised the doctors prescribed sleeping tablets and not AD from the outset? The thing about seratonin is true so not sure how sleeping pills are supposed to help? Usually AD is prescribed and if it doesn't work they up the dosage but often prescribe a course of AD combined with counselling as well. Please do get help though - you don't have to go through it alone. Thinking of you!

Lynsey

Well done for posting on a difficult topic. I know how your feeling.

I had PND with ds2 which was undiagnosed for 10 months. I ended up at my docs in tears, thinking I was losing my mind and my sanity and he put a name to how I was feeling - PND. I was stunned, like you I didn't realise....life was so busy that I'd just kept pushing on putting everyone else first.

Please, please talk to your health visitor. Please don't put on a front and pretend everything is OK.

PND is not something to be ashamed of. I was prescribed AD's - Lustral (Setraline). It took some time for these to kick in and start working. It also took time to get myself back together. It also took help and support from those around me.

Have a look at these websites:
Post Natal Illness Support Site
Association of PostNatal Illness

They have some very useful information that you can share with your partner, family and friends to help them understand what PND is all about and what they can do to support you. You will feel better, it will take time. In some ways you've done the difficult bit - seeing your GP....

Hope this helps. Hopefully there will be more good advice from other Mumsnetters out there.

mj

How are you feeling today Lynsey?

Thanks everyone. Just reading the messages helps alot. It is so strange as I can have a really good day then all of a sudden I feel like S**t. My Hv is coming soon so hopefully she will be able to help. I am sorry I didnt post back last night, was seeing to ds then watched celebrity BB. Sad I know but it cheers me up.
I will keep in touch.
Thanks for the support

Thats exactly how it is tbh - very up and down.

But like i said, we all have up and down days in life but when you have depression it emphasises those downs tremendously. I had a bad night with DS last night and the lack of sleep means im not having the best of days.

So i come on here. You will always find plenty of support. Please CAT me if you want to talk.

x