WTF? Why on earth would this have happened to me and how do I deal with it?

[WorriedAboutStigma]

Well, who would have thought it.... ?

I thought I was pretty chilled out, coped with whatever life threw at me and let stuff slip over me like water off a duck's back.

Seems not.

I had a psychotic episode pretty much out of the blue a couple of weeks ago and am now on Risperidone which quite frankly is fucking awful.

How do I get back to normal from here? Is normal ever the same again?

And as my namechange suggests, how do I deal with people who don't know what to say to me?

1. Mental illness is an illness - you wouldn't expect to never get cancer just because you're a fairly chilled out person, why should psychosis or depression be different.

1. Get a tight grip on your diet and exercise if you don't already. Risperidone causes weight gain and water retention, which will have a negative effect on your self esteem. Healthy food and regular exercise also boost your endorphins which will help you fight the mental health issues.

1. You don't have to discuss your medical history with anyone you don't want to. You don't even have to tell your partner if you don't want to, although not feeling you can may be an indicator of wider problems. Tell your best mate, mum, H/P... but only if they'll support you.

1. There's no such thing as normal, but you will feel better. If risperidone hasn't worked in a month or so, go back to the dr. You may need a different dose or a different drug. Push for counselling as well if you can.

You can do this

Quite scarily anybody can have a psychotic episode, even with no other history of mental illness. Unfortunately the brain is a big complex organ that occasionally goes wrong. It may well be a one off or not, but just get hold of all the support you can from the GP/mental health team.

There is no need to tell anyone that u don't feel comfortable with. I can't imagine how upsetting this must be for you, hang in there.

Thanks for your replies.

Unfortunately lots of people know about it. I sent a load of weird texts during the episode warning people that "they" were after us all and to go into hiding etc etc.

DH callled the doctor and got both sets of our parents involved to look after the kids. People will notice that I haven't been doing the school run etc.

I can still remember it all very clearly which is also a bit distressing. I was very close to being detained under the Mental Health Act

If the people you sent texts to are friends they wont mention it again,I know several people with the type of condition you describe and I never mention it unless they do,its no big deal ,you were 'poorly' now youre getting better.

To be blunt there but for the grace of God for most of us.

My son is on risperidone after having what was discribed as an unknown episode and violently attacking me in January he has SN's but his and our lives are so much better now give it time. x

Might be a bit soon for you to read through but this thread will make you aware you're not alone.

If anyone blanks you after this, just reassure yourself that they might just not know what to say. I'm sure that your genuine friends will just be reassured that you are getting better and want to support you.

Hugs
My Goddaughters mum had the same health problem, and that's how I see it. A problem with her health, not her!

Invent a virus and bluff your way through - a phone virus/hacking for the texts, a voimitting virus for the lack of school run!

Thanks for that link MrsHankey. I had a quick look, but you're right, it's too soon just now, but I will mark it for another time.

I am finding the tiredness and inability to concentrate the most annoying things just now.

I think everyone's said all the useful stuff already. My consultant says that concentration is sometimes the last thing to come back, so some people feel better for a time before the concentration returns - don't know how true that is.

After a major episode of depression, I was having difficulty in remembering things, and would often repeat the same "story" to same person, and couldn't remember who I said what to......and was getting things muddled up. I told psych cus I was worried but she said it was nothing to do with memory, it was to do with lack of concentration following the illness and she was right.

Upwardandonward - I haven't "spoken" to you directly but I have followed your thread from time to time. I well remember how ill you were earlier this year and it is so good to know that you are now so much better. And yes you are right, being sectioned could well have saved your life. The reason for sections of course is that in some psychiatric illnesses, the person does not believe they are ill - a sympton really and needs treatment.

I think you and your little gang have have been amazing to stick together for so long. You must have found it really supportive. I do have a smile though (when I'm not in a blip) at the "late summer edition" of the cybergarden. Maybe time to change to "winter edition?"

Sending you warm wishes and Happy Christmas.

It is nice to have such a supportive group, and I'm sure nobody would object to more members. When that thread fits 1000 soon, we'll have a new thread title.

Happy Christmas to you too, NanaNina

Hi worriedaboutstigma. I had a psychotic episode back in sept 2010. I was hospitalised for almost a month. I know what you mean about being worried about stigma but in my experience true friends will stand by you.

I've been well for a year now and things have never been better, I've just come off my anti-psychotic but am still on ad's.

Wishing you lots of health and happiness

Thanks everyone. Comforting, but not nice IYKWIM, to know that others have been through the same.

I went out today with ds1 which was nice to be out on our own (my family are not "allowing" me to do much) but goodness I was tired afterwards.

Has anybody had more than one episode? I just wonder if I would see another one coming, or if it would be different.

I've learnt to recognise my "early warning signs" eg. feeling moody, letting the housework pile up, difficulty sleeping ... I know that if any of these happen (without good reason) to seek help as I may be at risk of a relapse. Have you had any help with pinpointing what your early warning signs were?

As I've gone a year without relapse, the risk dramatically reduces but I'm still more susceptible to another episode than your average person.

I did notice that I wasn't caring much about stuff in the week or so leading up to it. eg DS1 hardly went to school and I wasn't fussed about going anywhere or doing anything. Maybe that is what to look for, I dunno...