I don't like anybody

[hibernating]

Long story short... always considered myself reasonably normal though prefer my own company to that of large groups. Had difficult time in late pregnancy, pre eclampsia, emergency c-section, and was really not very well after birth. Split up with baby's dad when he was 13 weeks old. My poor baby must have picked up on my state of mind as he rarely slept and cried a lot!!!! Anway, think I had PND but wasw not diagnosed.

Met new partner and things settled. Years later split up from him - very bad situation at work tipped me over the edge and doc put me on fluoxetine. Soon felt much better - now been on it 3 years despite trying to wean self off couple of times.

Sooooooooooo
I just don't like anyone apart from my DS whom I just adore. Have practically no family in this country, and the one whom l do have (my mum) is interfering old bad who uses her power in childcare as a control mechanism over me....

Have lived in a new area last few years (always moved around a lot since a child) and I just don't like anybody. I find people are nasty behind other people's backs, revel in others misfortunes and seem to delight in anything going wrong in my life.

I just don't like people. And i know lots of different people here - young and old

It must be me :(

You don't have to like anybody. As long as you're happy and content in yourself and your DS is happy, that's all that matters.

I don't like the vast majority of people I meet. I have a few good friends, no family, DH and the DC's who I love to bits and that's it.

DS definately happy - thankfully he has a much sunnier personality than me!! But I put ourselves out there into social situations as he enjoys it - I just hate it and can't wait to get home :(

As for me am happy when on my own or with DS at home or out and about just me and him.

Hiber - as Jasmine said, you don't have to like anyone.

You like your own company and that is a good thing. But you may find there comes a time when you need other adults, too.
Your son sounds so lovely - but as the daughter of a depressed mother, do take care not to over-bond yourself to him, or expect him to be your best mate, great company. Children can hide behind smiles - or, at least, I did.
The best thing you'll do for him is to allow him to grow up and away from you - - - that will be your job well done.

So fast forward to that time, when it will be (or sd be) just you, and he's left home. would you be ok with this? If so, that's grand. If not, could you start making small steps to befriend perhaps just one or two other adults right now? (And not talking lovers!)

• what do you like doing? listening to lectures, music, drawing, walking? whatever you like, do it, and then each time you do it, look out for someone else who looks like they are alone, or just looks interesting - say hello, and who knows what'll happen (maybe nothing.... but maybe you'll find a person you like - and likes you back).

You don't need to run with a big herd. There's nothing wrong with being a loner, even if our society makes us think so. Sorry your mum is an old bat - I know of what you speak - and well done for getting on so well with your own son!

You don't have to like anyone......but you do need to think ahead to your future. What will life be like for you when your DS has grown up and left home? If over the intervening years you have not formed any friendships then life could be pretty lonely...and what impact could that have on your mental health? Also, I'm sure that you don't want DS feeling responsible for your social contact as he grows older, and feeling guilty as he naturally enough pulls away from you and grows into independence and his own life?
People are often more likeable once you get to know them a little. First impressions can sometimes be deceiving. It's not necessary to have a big social network. I have a small one and I'm quite happy. But I do think that it's worth investing in a friendship or two. Maybe finding people who are share a similar interest might help, via sports clubs or evening classes or volunteering.

Selks idea of volunteering is great - tho I guess you may not have any time to do any of this if you're at work/looking after son after work? (Nor indeed to do any ofthe other luverly things I suggested ;) .

So I wonder: Does your son have any friends? If so, can you link up with one of his best friend's mothers? You may have to be the one to make a massive effort . But don't reject her just in case she rejects you. Secret is to be interested in others.
People aren't ALL horrible or out to get you - just as YOU clearly aren't horrible or out to get anyone.
In fact, you sound very caring (as one who dislikes gossiping and takes such comfort in your son).

Maybe forget about needing to LIKE anyone for now - just make an effort to get to know what one mum or two mums are like. Be an anthropologist.
You'll be helping your own son by your example -I mean, maybe one reason you dislike people so much is precisely because you've never had the chance to really befriend anyone - because you moved such a lot as a child and (perhaps?) because your own mum (the bat) was a bad role model for you? She does sound hard work. But not everyone is as hard as that. Try to look for the good in others, and others will find the good in you. Sorry, that sounds a bit god squad (and I'm not!!) - but I think it's true...

Hi, thank you for your replies. Given me food for thought and made me think about things more. I suppose I have been very hurt by people who I thought were friends in the past and its gone on from there... I work and am doing a course at college so no time for volunteering right now.. but I have lots of people that I talk to from these places but don't feel the need to friend them. Oh I am probably just odd. Lucky that I do like my own company though really!! :)

Hurt is a very powerful thing and can have a profound affect on our lives....it's natural enough to take 'defensive action'.....but the defensive position can take over. I can relate to what you say when you say this. I'm working through my own issues related to loss and trust. I also can relate when you say you enjoy your own company. Actually I think that is a very valuable thing that many others could benefit from developing. But we just have to be careful to keep a balance in life and not let things swing too far in one direction.

For what it's worth, I don't usually make friendships at work, either!

i know exactly what you mean and Im very much like you. Im happy with my own company and the kids and dh are the only important people whom I deeply care for. I do make friendships easily because I am chatty & outgoing, the problem is when you have known someone for a few years you form an emotional attatchment to them, then if they turn out to be different to you in some way or dissappoint you, you feel gutted. It is far easier to be aquainted with people and be casual than have close friends taking up parts of your life and expecting things in return.... Ive known girly friends fall out with one another and they have been devasted afterwards..its just not worth it.