My sister took an overdose yesterday because her boyfriend broke up with her. By her own admission, she did it because she thought it would make him come running back, not because she wanted to die. Indeed, she was in hospital within 30mins of taking the pills.
It's got me thinking about her life, the way she lives it, and it's become hard not to draw the conclusion that she might have an undiagnosed mental condition. I would appreciate some opinions.
She's 32 and finds it completely impossible to live independently. She has never held down a job, mainly because she can't help herself stealing from where she works and also taking lots of sick days, long lunches and half days. Consequently she hasn't had a job for about five years now.
She's terrible with money, spends it the second she has it and then can't afford to eat. Mainly she spends it on going out and drinking, and I know she takes cocaine and probably other drugs too. She also stole a great deal of money (about £500) from me several years ago when we still lived at home and has also stolen from our mum and dad as well over the years.
She finds it very hard to be alone, and when she is in a relationship, she is extremely clingy and over the top, becoming very serious straight away and often smothering the man involved. Every relationship is "the one" and has been since she was at school.
She is incredibly loving and sweet, a fantastic sister and auntie and the best friend you could ever wish for, but with it comes no empathy at all. She can't seem to see how any of her actions upset other people. She has three cats who she loves more than anything, but really doesn't look after properly. She lets them soil her flat, doesn't let them outside and often abandons them for days on end.
Everywhere she has ever lived has been absolutely filthy and horrible, even when she has been sharing with a boyfriend. The main reason blokes break up with her is that she just won't keep a place clean, even though she doesn't work. Mainly, she sleeps all day.
At 32, this really doesn't strike me as the behaviour of a "normal" adult. She seems to have been like this since she was a child, and never got past the mental age of about fourteen.
Do you think this goes beyond the scope of depression? Does it sound as though there's something wrong with her? If so, is there anything I can do to help her? I can't see her wanting to help herself, she sees her lifestyle as really rock n roll, but the squalor and degradation of what she is becoming is very difficult. I can't see a man taking her on long term, she is just too much hard work, and I am worried this pattern will just repeat itself and one day she will do herself real damage.
I'm sorry this is so long, I am pretty upset over yesterday's events. Thank you to everyone for reading.