Need help fast

[CKMUM]

I've been feeling low on and off for weeks, eevn months now but the last couple of weeks have been unbearable. I have been told prozac are ok when breastfeeding but would rather stop feeding than letting my daughters (I'm tandem feeding) getting drugs but would feel so guilty if I gave up feeding, feel gulty enough that eldest broke her wrist last week. I have also tried to keep a close eye on her but I was changing really bad nappy and she fell badly.

I have always said that even though I feel suicidal often I would never do it because I have 2 children to think about but as she has broken her arm I feel Im such a bad mother they should be with someone else anyway

would love to go back to brum but had a private lanlord before and it was awful and hard to move on as council wouldnt accept me on list then finally got lovely housing assoc property and left it behind to get away from him.
place im in now is private but its also housing assoc, they rent it from a private landlord and I find its better than renting direct from a private landlord but still find repairs aren't done

i rent from private landlord. its expensive 650 a month, i do get help as only work part time. i hate renting as you never know when the person who owns the property is going to tell you to move on and i couldnt get a mortgage.im going to ring my hv this week after reading your story, mine was very supportive after 1st son. i hope you will ring yours and get her to do a home visit so you dont have the hassle of getting the kids out. im sure she could have words with the appropriate people about the damp and conditions you are living in. i would hate people walking past my window and staring in especially if youre living on a knife edge wondering if its your delightful ex.xx