Should I go back on my ADs?

[MissNameyNamechanger]

I definitely needed ADs a few years ago - was on Citalopram for 2 years and felt fine on it and came off about 8 months ago and felt ok. But now I'm wondering whether I need to go back on them.

When things are going ok I feel alright (a bit stressed and fed up at times but isn't every SAHM like that?) but when things go wrong I feel completely overwhelmed and feel like the whole of my life is going wrong, even if it's just one aspect. I feel like things are out of my control. My two DCs are very difficult and I get wound up with them every day and usually shout at them every day too :( I have zero patience and get very angry. I cry several times a week, at often fairly minor things. I also often imagine bad things happening. But I definitely feel better than I did before taking my ADs last time and I don't have the 'black cloud' feelings that I used to have. I have a lot going on in my life and I find that instead of just picking up a phone to get something done, I put it off and can't face dealing with it.

I don't feel happy but then I don't feel that bad either. Maybe it's just a difficult time in my life and everybody would feel stressed and fed up in my place and it doesn't mean I need meds. Or maybe I'm just tired (DS wakes up very early).

My mum thinks I ought to go back on the ADs, she thinks I'm not myself. My GP says it's up to me - she doesn't think I definitely need them but she says I would feel better if I took them so I might as well.

I don't think I am 'properly' depressed, I think I'm just finding it hard to cope sometimes. Would you take ADs in this case?

i am doing that - i'm continuing to take them even though the initial crisis is over because if/when i don't, although I'm okish a lot of the time, i am occasionally terribly anxious and completely incapable, and it's just not worth living through that. i'm happy to take them for ever, rather than ever feel the badness again.

Thanks for your reply, MrsCornish. Glad that you are ok! I do worry a bit about going back on them as I felt so sick and ill... I will have a think about it.

I too would be one to say go back on them - you say you felt fine when on the ADs but then say they made you feel sick and ill - so am a bit puzzled. Maybe you need to try a different one, but yes you definitely sound depressed to me . I don't think it's helpful to think in terms of "properly" depressed - remember there are degrees of depression. I would go talk to the GP, you really sound like you are struggling to cope.

Hope you get the help you need and life becomes more manageable for you.

Won't go into details (would take too long) but let's just say depression and anxiety are no strangers to me, which is why I'm on the MH thread and the ADs make me feel better.

Sorry NanaNina, I wasn't clear - I meant that I felt sick during the 'settling in' period whilst I was starting to take them and again when I was coming off them but whilst I was on them I felt good.

I think it would be a good idea to go back on them, I know myself it's a daunting thought to carry on with them but at the end of the day if they make u feel that little bit better there's no harm in it, believe me it's not worth staying off them if your feeling down alot of the time, for me they take away that little something that ruins my day, stay positive

How long did you feel "good" for when you were taking them and how long did you take to stop taking them? I have been on and off ADs quite a bit and have now been off them for nearly two years which is my record. But this time I didn't start cutting down until I had felt "good" for at least 6 months and then I cut down really slowly (probably over at least a year). I also had CBT (when I was on the ADs but feeling fine) which helped a lot.

I would go back on the ADs if I were you. Hope you are feeling better soon.

I felt fine for at least a year on them and came off them over about 3 months, I think.

Thanks for your input, everybody.