Bulimia & Compulsive Eating

[buxomwenchonapony]

Is this the right place to post this? I'd certainly appreciate some advice...

I have had 'issues' with binge eating and purging (vomiting and/or laxatives) on and off for around 16 years. I can't believe it has gone on so long.

I eat compulsively at times - usually if I am anxious or under some kind of stress. I purge because I feel vile, and because it makes me worry less about putting on weight.

I am around 2 stone overweight, have been to various slimming clubs to shift it, but always ended up cheating by resorting back to binge eating and throwing it up.

I want to get a handle on this without having to tell my DH about it - is that realistic? I would rather not tell any of my friends or family about this.

What would the likely response be if I went to my GP? Is there anything I can do myslef to get a grip on this?

Thank you.

I remember reading that people who binge all have one thing in common - they impose restrictions on their diet (sometimes very unhealthy or realistic ones) So basically, if you say to yourself, I am not going to eat chocolate at all - what do you spend your day thinking about? Considering alternatives to? What do you crave? What jumps out at you at the shop or supermarket? So you resist and resist and resist until you can't stand it anymore and then you binge (been there, done that, t-shirt is in the wash)

I see it as a form of self harm. Also like an addiction.

Your GP may be able to refer you for talking therapy / a specialist service

I would think it's a great idea to tell your nearest and dearest - I know that you may feel ashamed of your problem, but there really is no need - you are ill and it's not your fault.

I was anorexic as a teen and had weight problems as an adult, I am fine now weight and health wise - if I can do it, anyone can.

Be kind to yourself and take it one step at a time.

I don't have any specific advice but just wanted to say that I am in a somewhat similar position in that I fairly recently relapsed into my old eating habits (having had a long-standing eating disorder for a decade whilst a teenager). I am pregnant so have probably been dealt with differently within the NHS, but like you I didn't want to tell my husband, family or any friends.

I agree with ManicPanic that it is best to tell the people around you, but I just wanted to point out that you don't have to. I haven't told anyone except healthcare professionals, and I don't intend to. I'm not sure how realistic this will prove longer term, I get the impression those people I have told think it is unrealistic, though it is working ok at the moment.

But I would say expect to come under some light pressure to tell your husband. I have been told that it is much easier to recover with the support of people close to you, and that I should not feel ashamed. I have also been told that if I am serious about getting better I should be more open with my husband, basically because it looks like I don't want to talk to him because I want the option of going back to the eating disorder at a later time. But I just wanted to say that it is up to you to decide, and don't let the fact that you don't want to talk to people close to you stand in the way of you getting the help that you need.

Hi buxomwenchonapony, if you're still there. I don't want to play down your problem by "just" recommending a book, but I'm reading one at the moment which might really help you. It's called Eating Less by Gillian Riley.

The title is a bit misleading because it's all about feeling in control of your eating, rather than cutting back necessarily. She recommends telling yourself you can eat anything, so you don't rebel against self-imposed rules, but being aware of the consequences in terms of your health and self-esteem.

For example, you could stop half-way through a packet of biscuits (rather than eat them all). You'd have to face your craving, which she calls addictive eating, but you'd feel proud of yourself and it would be easier the next time.

That's what i'm trying anyway. Best of luck with it.