feeling very anxious, someone please talk to me

[Gertiegoolash]

Hi, just a bit of back story, I have suffered twice with post natal depression, lasted longer with DD (now 4) and had severe anxiousness mostly about my health and my DC's. I was on citralopram (sp?) for the last 2 years with a short break in between (came off when I found out i was pg but unfortunately I had an mc). I recently (about a month ago) came off the citrolpram for good because both I and my doctor felt I was in a good place, had recently started a new job that I love, and feel happier and more content than I have in a VERY long time. Been feeling great and like I have turned a corner, BUT in the last week or so the old feelings are starting to come back. I have had a bit of a gippy tummy which I think could be IBS but then my dark thoughts keep telling me I ahve some form of cancer (i didn't even want to write it or say it in case it comes true, i know that sounds pathetic but there you go) my every waking thought is that there is something seriously wrong with me and I am starting to feel very down. I have had some CBT in the past and am desperatly trying some techniques but they are not working. I am so scared.
I apologise for the long ramble and if you got this far then thanks. Think I just need someone who can talk me through it and understands.

i'm sorry you feel so low, it's rotten after such a good run. Maybe you should talk to your doctor again? In the meantime you can call the samaritans any time day or night and that can be a lifesaver. Don't forget to take care of yourself and do something treatlike.
Xx

Thankyou overthemill, yes think I will definately talk to my doc, really thought I had finally got over needing ADs I am on holiday from work for the next 2 weeks so am going to try and relax and sort myself out if I can, before it takes full hold of me IYKWIM.

Hi GG, I just posted a thread of my own, so am probably not best placed to help you at present, but wanted to say I'm thinking of you with lots of sympathy.
OTM gives good advice - I think the GP is a good starting point.
There seem to be loads of people on this board who can sympathise and advise you because they've "been there".
I am sure someone feeling a bit brighter than I do will be along shortly.
In the meantime, take good care of yourself x

Health anxiety is horrible, I'm sorry you're feeling bad.

Remind yourself that everyone has a bad tummy from time to time. It's almost certainly not cancer. Are you doing your breathing exercises? Can you distract yourself with some kind of activity?

Thankyou SteelTownGirl it helps so much to know I'm not alone, hope you feel better soon too x

dearprudence, yes I've been shopping and took DD to the park most of the day and tried to keep as busy as I can, helps talking on here too

Hiya, everyone has bad days, but if you have had a bad time it is easy to mistake an ordinary bad day for the start of another bad time. If it's any help I have just had the best start to a year in a long time. Last week I went down and was starting to worry it wouldn't lift again.
But it has.

Well done for getting out shopping and taking DD to the park, you sound a good Mum to me! I'm sure that keeping busy is a good way of handling things. I'm going to try that tomorrow - so look there, you've helped me without realising it. I'd really urge you to see your GP though. They will have your history in front of them and will know how best to move forwards - they may be able to refer you for counselling or to talk to the practice nurse or community psychiatric nurse (I did that when I had PND 20 years ago).
For now, can you try distracting yourself with a TV programme or favourite film on DVD, or phone a friend for a chat?
I don't know about you but "sharing" on here is helping me feel a tiny bit less pessimistic?

midnightservant, I agree, and am really hoping that will be the case, SteelTownGirl glad I helped and yes I do feel better for sharing and knowing people understand how I feel, my friends and DH are lovely and sympathetic but none of them suffer with depression so they don't always "get" it.

Hi Gertie, sorry to hear you are feeling scared and low. It sounds as though you are very in tune with your mind and feelings, and you have plenty of support with your DH and friends (and on here). These dark thoughts are coming back - maybe now's the time to see the GP again and discuss going back onto citalopram as it sounds as though you got on really well with it. I think the other techniques will work once you've got your brain chemicals in balance again. I hope you can get back on track again soon.

thanks Goofymum