Depressed and have been for 20 years!! Any hope???

[mollyt]

I've had depression since I was 18.It runs in my family.I have tried every remedy known to woman kind every type of holistic therapy, detoxing, exercise,gardening ,counselling - I take citalopram and thyroxine and try and get tonnes of sleep and yet I get through day by day feeling generally crap.I only feel awake and alive when I am fairly pissed (2-3 glassesof wine or more) but do this rarely as obviously makes me feel worse.

I'm kind of bored of being quite depressed but honestly don't know what to try next??? any one got any ideas?????

I have only got the one idea, but it worked very well for me. Have you tried positive affirmations? It sounds crap but actually works so well. It means putting positive phrases in your mind which then stops the negative stuff building up. If you listen to your inner chatter, is it full of negative stuff?

If you write out some affirmations, in the present tense which is the opposite of how you really feel, and say them out loud three times each day, then your subconscious will start to believe the positive stuff and life will look less awful.

Things such as: I am feeling calm today. I am loving and caring.

If you are struggling with a particular thing such as shyness, then say something like, I am confident and take deep, calming breaths.

How does tha sound? It really is worth a try.

Is there anything in particular that you struggle with, or gets you down?

Oh, and another thing I did was to never watch the news on the TV, or listen to classical music, or put myself in a situation that I knew was a "trigger".

HTH

thank you for your idea - i will give that a whirl - positive affirmations going up all over my kitchen.it's definatly worth a go. not really anything in particular just a general low level feeling of 'could be happier' iykwim.

Have you had a psychiatrist referral? There are varying types + degrees of depression. You may need a new anti-d (but do NOT stop citalopram suddenly even if a dr says to - must wean off it). Also a psychologist's assessment will find the best therapy for you.
It may take months or longer to feel less depressed. When you are prone to depression it is so easy to give in, and so hard to fight.
Definitely stay off the wine, eat healthy and exercise. Make a plan for each day, and try to socialise at least once a week. Make sure you have someone or a pet who needs YOU - even be a volunteer. Ok it's selfish but it works.
Sorry if i'm wrong but it doesn't sound as if you've hit rock bottom yet - don't be like me and wait for that to happen. Get professional help now and hopefully you will learn to control your mood before it ruins your life.