anger and losing it with dc

[needtochangenow]

I hit my dd (age 9) this morning. I am so ashamed, I feel so bad. I did it because I was angry and felt out of control. I´ve done it before and everytime I swear not to di it again. The anger just comes and suddenly I flip...

I have put this here rather than in parenting becuase I feel stressed, lonely and unsupported. This causes frustration. And anger. Dh knows this but is too busy to support me more. His attitude is more get on with things, do something to improve things ...I know he is right but it´s so hard. Part of my anger this morning was becuase he is so involved in himself and was brusk to me.

What do I do? medication? how do I control my anger`? I don´t want to do this ever again.

Can you get a Dr's appointment? Try not to beat yourself up about it. Would you feel better if you apologised to dd about it later, so she doesn't think it is all her fault? You say there are Issues with dh. Would he consider any sort of Relationship counselling? Could any of it be hormone related, in which case you would be more aware of when you are more prone to this?

Don't know if you have other children or not, but can you do something relaxing for yourself today, to chill a bit, just do the essentials otherwise? Sometimes you need to give yourself permission to have time off!

sympathies - agree with sloggies ,don't be so hard on yourself .
I've done this ,bet lots have .
It's not like you think it's ok !
Have a ,apologise to DS tonight and just keep on trying .
None of us are perfect .

Thanks sloggies and gingeroots. It´s nice to be "heard". I have had the cuppa, thanks!, dealt with some work that was stressing me and feel a bit better. I apologised to dd straight away and she went to school happily but still don´t want it to happen again. I meant to go for a walk to relax but have spent too much time on my work. I shall keep trying. I will have to try to make it peacefully through the evening as dh at work until late.

Hope you're feeling brighter .
Children are very resilent ( not saying that your's needs to be )dd will have put it behind her and moved on .
Shame too much work to let you go for a walk and relax !
Be nice to yourself .

I think that anger that has already happened before you get a chance to step back from it - you've already screamed at them for something trivial or lashed out before you even knew you were that angry - is a rock solid sign of depression. The safety valve has gone. Please go and get help. Not fair on you or your child to chance this happening again.
And yeah, be nice to yourself, as well as to your child. Like gingeroots says, it's not as though you're Ok about it, or think you have the right as parent to lash out. Definitely apologise and explain it was wrong of you.