How can I find a good counsellor/psychologist for dH?

[MidlandsMom]

This is my first post on Mumsnet as I need some advice concerning my dH.

My husband's Dad died last September from cancer at the age of 55.

I know it has affected my husband badly but he finds it difficult to put into words how he feels about it.

He started to worry that he is going to die early too and is very stressed as he also has quite a demanding job. We have also been through quite a lot of emotional turmoil during the first few years of our daughter's life as I had severe PND and he was very supportive.

This all came to a bit of a head yesterday when we had a near miss on the motorway- 2 cars crashed at high speed and we were right behind. DH was very shaken up and said that he keeps thinking he's going to die.

I talked to him about getting counselling and he agreed and asked that I find a counsellor/psychologist. We agreed that we would be willing to go privately in order to be seen quicker (it took ages for me to get any help on the nhs when I was poorly). Does anyone know how I would go about finding someone specialising in bereavement and who is well qualified?

Thank you for reading!

Sorry to hear thatMidlandsMom.Really glad he is ready to talk to someone
As I don't know I am really bumping this in the hope that someone reads it who can give you a more informed answer.
Although I wonder if his GP should still be your first port of call.

Thanks for your reply colette. I will suggest seeing his GP, maybe the GP can refer him or suggest the next course of action. I just want to get him some help quickly rather than going on a waiting list if possible.
Thanks again.

Cruise? They're a specific organisation dealing in berievment and do offer councelling.

I really feel for you. Was in a similar position last year after my DH lost his best friend, (more like a brother). He became severely depressed and saw several councellors (not cruise), took lots of anti depressents. He really is back to his old self now and I am so greatful. At points I wasn't sure if I'd ever get him back.

there are a few avenues to explore:

The GP should be able to refer him for counselling but there can be a long wait.

Cruse Bereavement Care can help with counselling and support too specifically round bereavement. Becoming very aware of your own mortality after losing a parent is very normal.

There is the bacp website where you can find a qualified local counsellor

There are also local charities in most towns that offer counselling

Thank you very much for your replies, it's much appreciated. I will follow up cruse bereavement and bacp for help with counselling.

Medoitmama - Very glad to hear your DH is back to his old self, very encouraging to hear.

Suggestions above are good. I counsel for a bereavement organisation (not Cruse and not in your area by the look of it though) and we get most of our referrals through GPs.

BACP counsellors who appear in the site's directory are asked to list their areas of special interest (bereavement being one of course).

Hope your husband gets the help he needs.

Agree with suggestions above. I would also say it is worth meeting with 2 or 3 counsellors and then choosing the one he feels he can relate best to.

I would echo going through the G.P first. If you need to go privately for speed, then do check the person you see is properly qualified. BACP will have lists of registered practitioners and anyone working for the NHS has to be registered with the Health Professions Council and you can look them up to check if you see them privately.

If you go private, ask about how they work with people, how much an initial assessment is, how much follow on therapy sessions cost and how many sessions the person thinks would be helpful.

An assessment by the GP first is important though in case a combination of talking treatment and medication may be the most appropriate combination.

Good luck and keep hopeful.