I had a termination of a planned pregnancy due to the baby having disabilities. The consultant said there was a strong chance I would naturally miscarry . I also have enduring mental health issues and have been hospitalised more than once. I had a breakdown the following year around the anniversary of the termination.
It has been hard over the last four years I have improved but still suffer from anxiety and depression. I have been discharged from my community mental health team a few months ago but still have a helpline I can call. My DH was not that supportive and he really hates weakness in people so I have just kept things from him and seek solace with my sisters and a couple of lovely friends. It has been apparent that I am still quite fragile and my comfort zones are quite small especially at the time of the anniversary. I can manage going to work, food shopping and doing the school run. I am also fine visiting friends and relatives, known environments really. DH wants me to go away this weekend to a social do where I won't know people. I just don't feel up to it, I am fine with him going, he can even stay overnight if he wants to. The thought of this has given me two sleepless nights and and lots of tears. I have come to realise he is never going to have much empathy but I wish he would at least believe me when I say I can't manage some things. I offered to compromise and go for part of the day but he just got annoyed with me. The anniversary of the termination was this week.
I am at a bit of a loss really, our relationship has really suffered because of my issues following the termination. He just wants old me back, I want old me back, but so far it has just not happened.