Im really down and just need someone to talk to!

[yabbs]

I have posted before but things got better for a while but now here is me crying and just finding it hard to get out of bed. I live in holland with my 11 m old son and my husband who is in the army. I don't really have any friends out here as we have not very long moved here and its a small camp. I am looking into childminding at the moment be that takes a lifetime to come through. I just need some adult conversation its just me and my little one all day stuck in the house most of the time as I don't Drive. I sound so Stupid writing this I have friends in the uk but I am very alone over here. I have tried mums and tots but its so far away and the lady I go a lift with dosen't go anymore. sorry to go on.

Oh Yabbs, poor you!
Are there any friends of DH that you could meet up with? What about neighbours etc?
So sorry that you feel so lonely, but at least with MN you will always have some virtual mates to chat with! There are a few army wives on here.....perhaps they have some thoughts...

I so understand! I live in Switzerland and have had many days when I've felt incredibly lonely, incredibly foreign, isolated and chained to the house & baby. Please "go on"; talk to us! That's what MN is for.

You might have a bit of baby blues, totally normal but if it hangs around too long, please get some help from your GP. It will get better, promise!

I'd love to chat more but must get ready to see gynae. I'll log in later & see how you are.

xx

Hi Have been to the doctors loads of time they do whats called a post natal depression score and I am alway boarderline i just get days where I dont want to do much Thank god I have my mum and friends back in the uk. Is your husband in the army sansouci?
My little on is my life he is so good bless him he has been teeth the last couple of days which dont help.

Anyone able to chat feeling really down

Hi yabbs shouldn't be posting as I am at work, but just wanted to Say Hi and not leave you on your own.

{{hugs}}

H x

what about learning to drive? be something just for you, could you get childcare whilst you have lessons?

would stop you feeling so isolated, I know how you feel and I'm in the UK, your not alone having a small child is isolating.

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Im in a town called herrlen don't know if you have heard of it. I tired diving lesson sin july but failed am thinking about doing them again I have to go home to do them as I can't do them out here.My husband is on a course for a couple of months so I think it mite be a go idea to go home and do some lessons then. thankyou for your surport I just get really down sometime. It would be some much easyer if I had friends over here. I have been living aboard now for nearly 3 yrs we were in germany before but I worked and didn't have the little one and there the camp was just round the corner where as here its at least 45 mins walk.

Had a arguement with my husband tonight didn't help Just feel like laying in bed and crying. Really fed up today wish I could feel good again I have put on weight since I had my little one and just don't feel like the old me anymore.Just don't want to feel so down anymore!

yabbs; i am terribly sorry you feel so down. It must be very hard with yr husband in the army and you away from your friends. It sounds so trite, but honestly it is the only way to cope - take one day at a time. every bad day you have that you get thru, say "i got thru that, tmrw is another day". Things will seem bleak for a while perhaps but you have found the right website. Keeps me going. Are you religious? I am not, but I do like churches and chaplains - very useful places and people, and chaplains do listen

I'm in France, don't speak the lingo very well and have 2 kiddies, one just a babe still, so I know what you mean. However I'm due to start back at work soon so I will have an outlet. Can you not get your ds into a creche somewhere? If there isn't one local, why not put up ads for setting up a coffee group?

It's bloody hard at first, I know, but it soon passes. There will be people there wanting to talk to you but too afraid to approach you, start approaching people yourself and you will make friends I promise you!

hi yabbs i can understand how ur feelin ? i hope u r feelin better in sum way. i get lonely sumtimes as i am partially deaf. in the playground every1 is talkin 2 each other. but heres me on my own. its hard at times.

Thankyou all for your kind word and advice. Just having a really carp day today so I am hoping tommorow will be better.Its nice to know there are so many people on here willing to listen. Its hard because I can just approach someone as I don't see anyone on a daily basis and we live where there is englsih mixed in wiyh dutch people so I don't know who, who really. My husband use to work in a big unit but he only works with 3 other people over here so even he finds in hard. I am hopping to put the little one into nursey as there is a nursey a couple morning a week its just getting him there it will be nice for him to mix with other little one he loves being around other children.

You could ask at the nursery if there is another mother who could help you out with lifts there and back every now and again? You could also offer to help out there, that's always appreciated. Use your son to help you mix with people, there is nothing like kids to force us parents into socialising! Good luck, things will get better, the first year is probably the hardest, after that it's not easy, just different!

Thanks again everyone

Anyone around I am trying to sort out doing some driving lesson next month me and my little on are going to stay with my mum while my husband is on his course. so that sould be good fingers croosed I pass.

fingers crossed for you . think that's an excellent plan to give you a bit more freedom to explore.

H x

I have now booked my driving lessons and test we are going home on the 1st of october will be nice a its my little one birthday on the 6th so we can spend it with family and not on our own.