A positive story

[MiniMousse]

Hello
I used to lurk here and so thought it might be useful to others to read my experience.
I was suffering from quite bad depression and anxiety since birth of dd, but kept thinking no, I haven't really got PND, I just need to 'put mind over matter' (ah yes, that old chestnut). Well, to cut a long story short this lasted for well over 18 months until I finally 'caved in' (as I saw it then) and agreed to take anti depressants.
All I can say is it has been a bloody life saver. I feel happy, normal, balanced, positive, up beat, able to enjoy life, and can see colour and interest in the things and people around me again, including my lovely dd.
To anyone who is having even the slightest doubts about whether they 'really' have PND, or whether taking anti depressants is 'caving in' - DO NOT DELAY like I did. Try some. It really worked for me, the biggest sceptic, and I just wish I hadn't waited so long.
(disclaimer, I don't want to make anyone who chooses not to take anti ds feel bad by saying this, nor do I want to belittle those for whom anti ds dont work. I just thoought it might help waverers to read my story.)

Thanks for telling us your story. I am sure it will help others.

Glad you are feeling better.

Thank you for sharing your story! I'm really glad to hear that you are feeling so well. I must admit to putting off going to see my Dr, more because he is not a nice person, rather than feeling I am 'caving in', but reading your story has reminded me that I should really go and get some help as life is so nice when you are not feeling anxious!!

Thank you!

That's great Minimousse. What anti depressants did you take, and did it take a while to find the right ones?

Yes, life is lovely when you're not on edge all the time, Ladyem. The gp who actualy prescribed me the anti ds was dreadfully unsympathetic, and it was a really horrible consultation, and I came out feeling very 'belittled', but I am very glad I went, as the drugs really have worked! I sat there in tears telling him how dreadful I was feelign and his very words were 'well, that doesn't sound any different to what any other mum deals with' in a dismissive way, no further discussion. So, no great bedside manner there, but I am very grateful for the anti ds as they have lifted me to the point where I almost can't recognise that person who felt so desperate and worn down. I think what I am trying to say (in a long winded way) is that even if you don't like your doc, go along and get some - the change they can make to your brain chemistry and how you react to things that would have previously ground you down is amazing.
Arcadia - I'm on 50mg of sertraline, its the first one I have tried and it seems to work for me. Felt excessively sleepy for first few weeks and had a bit of a funny sort of weirdly watery mouth, but both those side effects have gone now and I feel just really balanced. Not too up, not too down, just great. (I sound like an ad, don't I?!?)
Lynli- thanks. yes I am hoping that others who are wavering about whether their feelings are something they can just 'pull themselves out of' will read this and it will help them to make a decision one way or the other. I know I felt so sceptical that anti ds wouldn't work, and all I could think was 'oh, they won't work for me, and I'll get horrible side effects, and so I'll just have to try and pull myself together'. I look back now and realise that that thinking was probably driven by my depression in the first place, but I do remember trawling this board looking for positive stories to sway me in the other direction, so I hope my story will help others.

You are right, Minimouse! I did go and see my GP about 6 months ago and he was like yours. He actually told me I was being silly , rolled his eyes hat I was still BFing my 8 month old and told me I would be wanting to stop that now, and even accused me of having an eating disorder - which I definitely don't! He just didn't listen at all. Heard what he wanted to hear and saw what he wanted to see. I might see if I can see someone else.

Yes, might be a good idea to see if you can see someone else in the practice. I think many gps are totally crap at dealing with mental health issues and I get the impression they have very little training about it either. I also think they probably feel under a lot of pressure to see all their patients in a their alloted time slot, and therefore some of them baulk at mental health stuff as they know its not going to be a short consultation.
I really wish the NHS would spend more on preventative mental health stuff, I am sure it would save them a lot of money in the long run!

PS meant to say, I am still bfing my 2 year old! It surprises me how many health care professionals have been negative about extended bfing to me tho, especially as the WHO recommends bfing until 2.