Time to give up.

[SlowlyLosingItQuicker]

I've suffered depression for a while now been getting hel;p antidepressents and counselling its not working. I've been pushed over the edge tonight by my husband I'm such a fucking failure theres no point in going on like this. I can't even sharpen the fuucking knife to kill myself.Why has it all got to be this way? What on earth happened to my little bit of happiness? What did I do that was so bad? I just want to finish it all tonight. I just wanted to post this so someone somewhere knows I exsisted. I wish so much I could of done better for DD for my family but I failed at that just like everything else. No fuckinng support system nothing. No friends no family. Enfd of the line I guess. I dont have any goods memeories to take with me either.

If you have no good memories to take with you maybe it's not time to go yet.

What happened that your dh pushed you over the edge?

How old is your dd?

DD is seven.

DH just says the most awful things to me and its stupid because hes all I've got to support me thats gone now theres no point in carry on. It hurts too much.

7 is too young to lose your mum....please hang in there.

What is causing the pain? Did bad things happen to you?

you know DH is spitefull
can you just ignore him?

Just read your other thread, seems to me your DH is dragging you down a bit at the minute.
Is there anywhere you and DD can spend some time away from him for a bit? Maybe get some headspace to think about things properly?

Have you thought about calling the samaritans? (08457 90 90 90 beginoftheskypehighlighting 08457 90 90 90 endoftheskypehighlighting)
Or is your counsellor available to just call up, talk about what you're going through?

Please get yourself to women's aid. LEAVE HIM. Also phone the Samaritans. Your dd needs you. He's an absolute twat and you need to be free of him. Can you phone an ambulance and get them to help you too. I think mabe you should and tell them you are being abused and need to get to a refuge.

Please please call the samaritans
talk to someone in rl.

walk out of the house if you have somewhere to go and have a cuppa with a friend.

you are a valuable wanted, needed, person. Do you want your child to believe that you didn't love her enough to stay?

(I know this sounds harsh but this is only what I have been told over and over having been in therapy for the last 2 years - things can and will get better I promise!)

SLIQ - so VERY sorry to hear of your plight. I am recovering (or trying to) from a severe episode of depression and was hospitalised for 3 months this year. I too wanted to get rid of myself at my lowest point and planned sliding into the canal. Fortunately I was offered in patient care and the ADs helped with the awful days.

One thing I read which was given to me and it has stuck with me:

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

Sending you good wishes and hope you can hang on in there and believe there will be brighter days ahead, presumably without your H. He is obviously making things much much worse for you.