Hiya Upsy
I was on sleeping pills ( ambien / zopiclone ) for twelve years .. til a year and a half ago .. was completely dependant on them and it took me a good six months to get off them but am now completely off them and I think its the biggest achievement of my life !!
It was hard work -I had to retrain myself ..Like you - my need of them followed the birth of my first child when I suffered severe PND and PTSD .. I couldnt sleep without them ..
I tried mirtazipine a couple of years ago and it certainly knocked me out - but I couldnt cope with the massive weight gain it gave me - a stone a month at least ... twas horrible...but that doesnt mean it would do that to you of course .
I came off the sleeping pills in bits and pieces .. Id have a couple of drinks to wind me down, have a bath and have a herb tea ...then Id take half a tablet ..Most nights that would do it, then Id wake up early but I had to just accept that for a bit ..
Next step was to get to bed with out the half a tablet - I always kept 1/2 a tablet on my bedside table so I knew it was there if I really couldnt sleep ..again, most nights I would get through ..
I would take a whole tablet at the weekends so that I didnt get too exhausted ..
and I just carried on, slowly the weeks turned into months until I was only taking tablets at weekends or on the very odd bad night.. So i began to cut down the weekend ones to half..
It was really hard but I never ever thought that I would get off sleeping pills ..thought i was on them for life ..
But it can be done ..
I still have bad nights now and again but manage to cope by having a herbal tea and using Molton Brown Sleep mist ...
If I cant sleep i force myslef to get up - for me lying there tossing and turning makes the whole thing worse..so I get up, make a drink and watch a sky plused Eastenders or something quick and brain dead..
I only stay up for half an hour or so and then nine times out of ten at least when I go back to bed I go to sleep...
I really feel for you .. have been where you are and its so hard...
Good luck ...
I may check out the insomnia thread too.. am currently 7 months pg and terrified I will start the post baby cycle all over again ...