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Mental health

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I really fucked up tonight.

1 reply

ThereAgain · 31/07/2010 02:02

I went back to how I 'was'.

I have had a stomach bug for about 5 days so haven't been able to take my tablets.

My husband did something a bit thoughtless, but didn't mean t hurt me (but he did) and I went off on one like I used to.

Being verbally disgusting and I even punched him in the arm

I've apologised and he has accepted but its really upset me to see how fast I can return to that horrible person who I thought I had left behind.

The last few months I've looked back on how I used to be and cried with shame, yet from just missing a few pills I am back there again, and the worst, very worst part of it is that I couldn't stop myself, and the smiles I was giving him, the smirks, were real.

But after, now, I feel so ashamed. But I turn into this monster

Fuck, theres something so wrong with me

OP posts:
willsurvivethis · 31/07/2010 09:38

Ok, hope you are having some sleep now

But what tablets have you not been able to take? And what help have you had apart from tablets? It sounds like you need some good old fashioned therapy to get to the bottom of this and then learn new strategies.

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