I need a little bit of help here. Yesterday I completely lost the plot and started bawling my eyes out when my new blokey came round and my previously whiny, hard to handle ds went straight to him and turned into the most placid little boy you'd ever meet.
My ds (3.5) has ASD, is mostly non-verbal and has a violent temper when he gets frustrated. He just whines and screams all day no matter what I do or say.
I just feel like I am completely useless at helping or understanding him and yesterdays reaction was the straw that broke the camels back. I just put my hands over my ears and sobbed.
Blokey was trying to be nice and said that everyone has bad days and that I will feel better soon but he doesn't understand that I have had depression in the past and I never want to get as low as I did then.I was contemplating suicide and killing my ds(then 4 weeks).
I shocked myself at how low I was as I hadn't seen any of my normal warning signs(tiredness, not wanting to cook etc) and I was so proud of how well I was doing since I came off my AD's
Was I just having a bad day, overwhelmed by the amount of effort it takes to keep up with my ds or could my depression be rearing its ugly head again.
Sorry for the whinge but I needed to deal with it now before it goes to far.