Not good at football ds- should he stay at football club

[change23]

It's a free football club at the school once a week. We spoke with ds and decided to put his name down for him to give it a go.

He is very bad at it apparently. From what I understand, KS2 boys are given a ball and play a match. He's seven and small for his age. Not very 'sporty' (he is very active!), no ball skills, etc. He was already 'told off' last time by the teacher for not kicking the ball. He says he never gets near it ever.

Would you encourage to keep at it or is this just terrible for his confidence and just giving the rest of his classmates a reason to pick on him?

Does he want to stop? If so I'd let him.

He's not sure.
He only had one session with the ks2 boys so far, and one with ks1 (oddly).

If he's happy I'd let him carry on..some things take time...

At that age its not about skill. Its about being active. If he enjoys it, then continue. If not then find a different sport to try. But he will only learn ball skills with practice

I always thought it's good for him to play a bit of football so it's an option for him during lunch breaks at school, an opportunity to make friends with more kids.

I guess I'm surprised they are only doing actual matches at that club.

He can kick a ball and played lots with dad or grandad but I guess the pace is different.

@change23 This is quite difficult, The club is probably set up to play and not focus on skills. As he’s 7, he does have 3 more years to rejoin but I can see why he wanted to give it a go. If he likes football, would he be better off joining a proper club set up on FA coaching criteria? Or try another sport? Touch rugby and running clubs were popular around here.

All of KS2? So Yr3-Yr6, all playing together?

I think even a good small 7yo would struggle against 10 and 11yos.

If he enjoys it and it's free I would let him keep going. If he doesn't enjoy it (and it doesn't sound as if he's getting any actual training) I would let him drop it.

Mainly though, if he's interested in football and he's 7, I would find a good local club outside school with a training session for his age group. He's at an age where the standard suddenly shoots up and out of reach of kids who aren't playing and training regularly, and it does no harm to give him a chance to stay involved if he so chooses.

At DS2’s football club, in most year groups, they have a competitive team and a less competitive team that played in lower divisions. The ethos was that if the boys wanted to play, there was a team for them. Maybe he needs more that kind of vibe - if it bothers him, that is.

He came out saying 'I was the worst player' so it does bother him.
Part of me is hoping he'll pick it up if he carries on, but I also don't want him to end up completely hating it/ not believing he is capable.

Local paid club with a training programme sounds good. I had thought they'd be more competitive than a school club, which I imagined would be more 'for fun' and v supportive.

If he is enjoying it yes he should stay. But if he isn't then stop - it doesn't sound like a very good club if they're telling off 7 year olds for not kicking the ball , surely they're there to learn?
He might prefer a non team sport more like climbing, swimming or gymnastics?

@change23 A local club should be run with FA coaching protocols. Yes, matches might have too involved parents, but they should have sequenced teaching of skills prior to getting into a team. If he gets a grounding in skills, he might enjoy school football in the future.

Speak with whichever teacher is supervising this re telling him off as that’s not right. Everyone has to start from scratch. At our school they separate ks1 and ks2. It is matches each time but your child will get better each week. If it’s too much for them now try again in a few months. Good luck.

Have a look at the free McDonalds football. My kids do it and they teach more skills.

Thank you. Nothing local to me but otherwise looks quite good!

He's 7 years old, give it time. There's not many dc that are naturally talented, it's application that makes a difference. I think being able to play to a decent standard is useful for boys in particular, friendship wise.

Maybe he would prefer the kind of set up where they teach ball skills rather than playing a match. Maybe check out what is available eg at a leisure centre.

He had another one now and he walked out much more positive. He said it felt better. So, we'll give the next one a go too...

It's a shame the school didn't do this club last year when he was still in KS1.

Sounds like my DS at that age. I wasn't keen for him to play as I knew he wasn't good and wanted to shield him from the disappointment. However he desperately wanted to regardless. Most of the local teams were full and we had some not very nice experiences trying out teams which ended up not being a good fit for him.

A few years down the line and he is now 10 and still really into it. He's improved massively but he's still small and not one of the best players on his team but doesn't seem out of place either. It took some time, but thankfully we have found a better team to play with and he plays at school (lunchtimes, after school etc) as well.

I don't know if this helps at all. I'm glad for him that he has finally found a team that he fits into, at least for now. But I feel football comes with a lot of drama and isn't always inclusive and in some ways it would be nice if he had found a different sport.

I think your DS probably needs to try some training, either could join a team for training only without committing to matches, or join one for the paid for fun weekly training or holiday camp sessions. If he still likes it then you could pursue further.

I'd let him choose tbh. If he enjoys it and wants to carry on then let him, at that age its not super competitive yet. If he gets fed up and wants to stop, I'd not make a massive deal out of it.

Is there anything else he could try? Gymnastics, tennis, cross country, horse riding, dance of sine kind? Lots of activities don't rely on him being sporty as such. I've been fat and uncoordinated since I was about 10 so definitely not sporty in any way but can ride to a decent standard and was good at badminton at school.

If he enjoys it I would find him a well run local club that encourages him. At that age, it really should be about having fun with your team mates, learning basic skills, and building a foundation.

The school club sounds like it may be a paid thing (they do it at my son’s school). I am pretty sure that kids should not be allowed to play with anyone more than two years older. I am pretty sure that’s the rule in normal grassroots youth football so may be worth checking with the school whether that is a positive experience. I would also question why they just play a match. If you are paying for it, I would expect more than just a teacher throwing a ball in and saying here you go. The idea would be to learn! I hope he grows to enjoy it. There are some amazing clubs locally that will give that experience if the school can’t.

I have had kids involved in many different sports, and the most toxic by far is football. I have no idea why it's so exclusive from such a young age.

Potential money

Oh come on. At 7?

Yes. Football is hugely competitive often from a tiny age. Lots of the DC will be playing at clubs at age 4 up. Organised club teams start at 6/7 in mini leagues. So ops boy at 7 if playing juniors KS2 boys may well struggle to compete with them even in a fun game. With club football there is an often lot of competition to excel and even get into academy football.
DC link football often with fame & fortune. Depends on area but can generate that culture