DD12 doing too much dance??

[basilbrush]

[A very frivolous concern given global events, I know!!]

My DD, age 12, is doing ballet (Grade 4 class plus an extra intermediate foundation), tap (Grade 3) and modern (Grade 4) this year. I always said I'd never let her do all three but here we are!

I should point out that she only started ballet last year. They put her straight into Grade 3 as she showed promise and she's progressed quickly.

This equates to 5.5 hours of classes a week. The cost, of course, is crippling but my main concern is that she risks doing too much and becoming exhausted. Also school work - she's only in Year 8 but there's no way she could fit this in with GCSEs etc?

She really really loves dancing. During lockdown she danced to DVDs / online classes for an hour or two pretty much every day for 6 months by choice.

I have told her that she can do all three this year and then she has to give one up. This has not gone down well at all and caused her much angst.

I don't think she realises that as you progress in ballet, it takes over your whole life and you really just need to concentrate on that. She's not en pointe yet, should be within next six months, depending on lockdown closures of dance school etc. At a push she could keep either tap or modern going on the side to add a bit of variety??

Any one had similar experience with dance-mad daughter?? What did you decide to do?

Thanks!

If its just a fun hobby she enjoys then I wouldn't go above 8-10hrs of formal lessons even if she pushes for it - I've told DD the 7 she does now is her limit, but have converted half the playroom into a dance studio so she can practice at home. If she wants to pursue it seriously then she probably needs to do more, especially the ballet. Maybe just see how she goes for now. Very jealous of the super close dance school, ours is miles away.

My sister did loads of dance as a child. Eventually she did the exams and became a dance teacher (PT) while she finished her education. So it can become something even if it’s not high level or a career. She loved doing it.

Loads of the kids at DS’s swim club go on to become lifeguards and/or coaches/teachers as PT jobs through sixth form and university. And several have chosen careers somewhat inspired by their swim experiences (sports medicine type roles). DS might choose to do one and/or the other in the future - I’m under no illusions that he’s the next Michael Phelps. 😂

Sadly he might also take up an interest in triathlon and be moaned about by partners in the future for family-avoiding training and competition antics. That seems to be popular among ex competitive swimmers. His previous coach told them all they’d make brilliant triathaletes.

So it may go somewhere, even if it’s not prima ballerina in the royal ballet.

I always did better with schoolwork when I had more scheduled activities, as I had less time to procrastinate and couldn't think 'oh I've got hours to do it'.

And it's great exercise for her.

I danced every night of the week after school through my teenage years, mainly ballet and some contemporary. I loved it and it was a way of life for me. I didn't go into dance professionally but I still do weekly classes and still love it!

My 12yo is doing two hours of ballet (IF/intermediate/pointe) and an hour of contemporary on weekday evenings (down from five hours before lockdown, because of covid timetable changes).

At the weekend, she does an Associates for three hours on Saturday, and (just for this term) youth ballet on Sunday. She also tries to fit in a private lesson, but that varies depending on teacher availability. So that adds up to about nine hours, and I think it will go back up to around 10-11 as soon as covid restrictions ease.

She also sings in a choir and plays an instrument, which takes up two evenings.

For her, this is energising and refreshing. For me, it would be much too much! She uses lunch break at school to get most of her homework done, which is working quite well as they’re limited in terms of clubs and where they can go due to covid.

Completely depends on the child and whether they can be organised to fit in schoolwork etc. My daughter trains (not dance but sport) for 7.5 hrs over 4 evenings a week however the journey there and back is 90 mins so an additional 6 hrs out of the house on top of actual training. She has learnt to be organised, do homework whenever she can and spends time in the car prepping for tests and doing revision as her school seem to test very frequently. She is keeping up with schoolwork, in top sets for everything and predicted minimum of grade 8's accords the board.

If her schoolwork started to be affected we may reconsider her schedule but at the moment she is coping fine (just started yr 9).

This is about what my recreational students of her age do. My dance team do 8-10 hrs of classes a week (by choice, it's not compulsory). One of the most valuable lessons they learn is how to manage their free time (and homework) efficiently to be able to train for this number of hours.

Ballet is fairly essential core dance training to underpin other types of dancing.
What she’s doing feels about right and not excessive to me. It’s the same with anything you want to do well, you have to train and practice.

I’m trying to remember how much our daughter did at twelve. It an hour each for tap and jazz, with more when exams or shows were approaching. Ballet was four hours during the week plus alternate Saturdays. By sixth form it was much more, with travelling to Birmingham most weekends thrown in.

Dance was her life. She didn’t want other extracurricular stuff and gave up flute to continue ballet.
Her schoolwork was probably enhanced by having time out with a different focus. The hard bit was deciding whether to continue post sixth form and not do her academic degree. She decided her dancing would stay a hobby not a career.