October Music Thread

[Wafflenose]

Welcome to the thread for October, which is open to ANYONE who wants to discuss music lessons, practice, exams, auditions, instrument hire/ purchase or whatever related issues you'd like to. Newbies are especially welcome, and we have some each month, often with beginners. All of our kids were beginners once.

I have two DDs. Goo is 12 and plays the flute and piano. She can also play recorders and the piccolo, but doesn't. We've just moved her to another piano teacher because the first one retired, so it's nice to hear her practising again. She has been learning for about 2.5 years and hasn't done any exams... nor is she intending to. On the flute we have extended range scales, the Chaminade Concertino and Bizet's Carmen Fantasy at the moment. She plays in 7 school ensembles and does NCO and South West Music School, although she's likely to be leaving both at various points during this academic year.

Rara is 10 and plays the cello and clarinet regularly, and recorder sometimes. She's vaguely working towards Grade 5 on both, but it might end up being 4 on the cello because of various aspects she's behind in... we'll see. I am still teaching her the clarinet and am currently super fed up because however kind, patient and helpful I am, she behaves in such a horrible way. We can't afford lessons. Ho hum. Rara also does NCO and SWMS. Under 11s will be beyond her, but she'll carry on with SWMS for now.

I am a teacher of woodwind!

Oh Trumpet it's really difficult.

We are waiting to find out when DS2s Grade 8 piano is, it is usually last week locally. Which will be first week of GCSE mocks. Not looking forward to that email.

We are also having a disagreement with the music dept though. DS2 is very heavily committed externally at the end of November/December. School is putting on a musical. The last two DS2 cleared his calendar and last year practised a lot as he was piano. Both times they changed their minds re band and he wasn't wanted.

This year he said no, they hadn't given dates, he had too much on. They kept asking. I wrote, also pointing out mocks. They are still making comments to him about how disappointed they are.

Sad reading the stories above. That is one of the reasons some people choose specialist school. My DS got in trouble early on for prioritising maths homework over a music event he considered to be not so important and got told never to do that again. However, doesn't need to be like that even at normal academic state school although I can see from the teacher and school's perspective where they are monitored so closely and become obsessed with narrow targets. At the state school my DCs attend actually the opposite is true. Sometimes they get dragged into music rehearsals ahead of a big event missing whole day of lessons. If there is a clash with say a sports fixture even if DC wants to play the match instead of music then HoM will make sure music gets priority.

for trumpet, floot and raspberry.

Pressure can come from the school, but also internally from DCs. For example, DS2 was frantically writing his history essay while waiting to go into his NCO audition warm up, although the teacher was happy for him to hand it in a day or two late!

Honestly, the pressure does not come from me or DH, and I do worry about how he will manage in later years when academic expectations ramp up (he is only 10 atm).

Alex but that’s a lovely attitude from the teacher and in fact ds’s teachers do all ( at least at parents evening) talk positively about his music . Taggie oh yes the pressure definitely comes from him too!!
Good luck to your ds with his grade 8 raspberry . Ds’s November and December are also scarily busy but at least he can breathe out over Christmas- I’m sure we’ll all survive it ( somehow !!) School shows do take up masses of time - ds is doing his again in November and whilst he looks forward to a week of no lessons for rehearsals that does also lead to its own pressures though the shows are always amazing and I like that school allow music and drama to take priority at times

DD1 is the one struggling a little at the moment with lots of deadlines looming and extra activities at school as well as externally. Various end of unit tests, but with little time to revise and get homework done due to theatre trips (English), D of E trsining weekend (through school), scholar’s concert next week, Grade 7 sax exam in 6 weeks etc. Also having a panic about art GCSE coursework due to be handed in after half term when she is spending 3 and a half days doing the county youth orchestra.

She went to the sixth form open evening thinking she wanted to do IB rather than A levels and all the teachers were very supportive as she is a true all rounder. Got to her physics teacher who completely destroyed her confidence by telling her that she shouldn’t even think of that as she’s not organised enough and she should do A level where they could ‘manage’ her and basically berating her in front of me. Really not how to deal with her! I was really cross! I then had to pick up the pieces at home. She now doubts herself completely. I have told her to go and have sit down with the head of year to talk through whether they think she is capable of doing the IB route. We think she is, but she will have to be ruthless with her organisation.

Double to your dd that’s awful and not how school should have talked to her . To me it doesn’t sound like the IB isn’t necessarily the right route for her just that she is a true all rounder and so has a lot on !! This will be my dd in a few years , she is the opposite of ds and is very involved in a wide variety of extra curricular stuff all of which she loves and can never imagin

Posted too soon - imagine cutting back on

hmmm.. I can see Noo getting increasingly stressed about this kind of thing as she gets older. Music is important to the school, and her HoM carried a lot of clout so I am confident that they will be quite supportive. But she puts so much effort into all her lessons / homework and I can already see she is going to really struggle to have to compromise on that. They want to be brilliant at everything, don't they!!??

Noo having a hard week this week - I think the adrenaline rush of starting secondary school, JD and everything being completely new has finally taken it's toll. She is very clingy, emotional and has been sapped of all her energy. I wonder if she might have some kind of virus.... We've been cancelling all extra-curricular except for practice (which has been short and focused) and trying to have some chill-out time. Roll on half term!

Trumpet, only that teacher and dd says that she trusts her judgement as she says it like it is. She was distraught! One week to half term for her - just the scholar’s concert, a maths test, a biology test and 6th Form scholarship test to go before then...

folk half term can’t come soon enough for DD2 either. She also wants to do well in everything at school including sport. It’s a long school day and then trying to get everything fitted in is not easy - and she’s so stubborn! Small matter of her NCO audition next week to get past before then. Frustratingly little practice and focus happening. I think she is a little ambivalent about it at the moment and if you add tired and emotional, it is not a good mix. It’s fair to say that getting in will be a long shot this time round.

I feel for you & your ds Trumpet. Hopefully Amanda Spielmans proposals yesterday will bring meaningful & much needed change, removing the tyranny of Progress 8 targets etc. I feel slightly guilty, as I now find myself almost completely removed from the day to day management of my ds's time and the attendant stress. It was quite a shock at first but, as the term has progressed, I find that it has much to commend it! Very good luck to your ds for the NCO audition at the weekend.

Doubleup - going through IB hell at the moment with DD and it is not to be underestimated especially if DC wants to keep up music to a high level. My DD has definitely had to ease up on music and sport. Saying it does depend a little on subject choice. There are options to make is less demanding but IB Higher Physics (and Maths) is not one of them. DD has very academic friends studying A levels (starting with 4 dropping to 3) and they have so much more time for non-academic activities.

Druids I’m not taking it badly at all - i know it’s just the reality and I don’t expect preferential treatment for him ( though 1 less gcse would make life easier ) but I don’t want him to fear detentions or extra homework if he doesn’t do as well as the teachers want . He’s only in year 9 and so this year and next year should mostly be about doing his best in the time he has . It’s the attitude that if he doesn’t do well then he hasn’t tried that annoys me . I think he will end up doing far less music in year 11 to survive his GCSEs and that’s fine but he shouldn’t feel that he has to do that now .

Oh dear dd is sure she wants to the IB route..... I find this handing out of detentions etc for a lower test or homework result a bit odd. For a highly compliant child like dd it is a challenge - never had a demerit or detention in her school life but it’s slmost inevitable now I would say. Dd also expected to turn out to perform incl weekends so it is truely hard to juggle it some weeks. I do get the school can’t fkex for the many children doing stiff - guess I am lost for an answer 🙄

But I do wish she would downgrade one instrument - really does add to the pressure to try to keep them joint.....

With DS1’s school they have a simple but effective system: demerits and detentions are confirmed by the house room tutor. The tutor regularly has scrapped demerits received by DS1, if, for example, he has had a tough day, or is overwhelmed with commitments. Similarly, the tutor can spot and solve emerging pattern - eg a spate of late preps from DS1 in y7 turned out to be because he had lost his planner and was scared to ask for a new one! The tutor has more of an overview than individual subject teachers.

I do agree that formal punishment for poor academic performance is harsh. We all have off days!

Stringchild - I don't want to pour complete cold water on the IB as overall i think it is great but combining with serious music is a big challenge. I know several children who have done it and then gone on to music college but it is a big challenge and a lots of work so need to be quite canny picking subjects.

String I have no idea how she keeps 2 first studies going !! Hats off to her

In the comments section on the mark sheet from his G8 Trumpet exam my ds is referred to by another childs name (it was the preceding candidate). I've decided to try and get the sheet re-written and have just contacted Trinity. Not sure if they will do this, but its very annoying!

Gosh, that's terrible, but I suppose accidents happen.
perhaps if you tell them he needs the transcript for an interview as well as the certificate.

I too am feeling a little relieved that dd is specialist school to. I know that otherwise a school would be needing her to do so much extra work for GCSE, that music commitments would be well out of the question.
I suppose you can't blame the schools, they have targets to achieve and extra curricular activities are the first thing to be expected to give.

to all whose DCs are juggling and struggling - it's def one fat reason why we thought of specialist school as an option. DS used to be allowed to leave school earlier once a week for his football commitment at primary school (until he decided to drop it). It was possible because primary school wasn't demanding academically like secondary school but also it was a tiny school so the head knew all the children and most of the families so could see things at individual level. The school DS was supposed to go after primary school was enormous, so even the HoM was very understanding and the school specialised in music (and language and science), I am sure they wouldn't be able to cater DS's needs and as many DCs on this thread DS would try to respond to all the demand stretching himslef to do well in everything and his music would suffer greatly.

However, DS's current school had a massive direction change recently and they are more enforcing academic commitment than ever. DS mentioned some academic assessments/tests here and there so he still has to find time to review and prepare for them between his already packed schedule. A noticeable difference between the school he was supposed to go (regular day school) and this current school (specialist boarding school) may be the latter keeps me less worry about juggling, not because DS doesn't need to juggle, but because I have no information what's going on with their schedule! I would like to know what he's up to and whether he's got multiple deadlines but part of me think it may be better this way to keep myself sane... It's not good for my OCD nature....

I always say this at every opportunity, but I'll join Trumpet to hat off to ministring here again. Incredible.

Littleladsdad, oh no! How annoying!!

Littleladsdad that’s awful hope you get it sorted

stringchild be aware with the IB that UK universities don’t really get it - their offers for IB students can be a lot higher than for those without (eg asking for 41/42 out of 45 which is equivalent to a in 3 a levels and 3 as levels - where their standard offer might be lower than 3 a )

We have the option of specific ' streams' at our high school, which allow for a couple of extra periods on that subject. Eg for football, all your PE is football, for STEM, all your maths and science are combined. For music, you miss drama and art to get two extra periods of music. It is only in its infancy but I will need to consider it for DD in the summer as she will start at that school. It is not high performing, their broad aim is to get to grade 3 on guitar, drums, bass or voice. They also do lots of group work. I'm still to be convinced that oboe and piano will fit into this set up, although they have said that if you come in with different instruments, you will be accommodated and challenged. DD would love to spend more time playing, I just want it to be productive so will look forward with interest to the next information evening. It is the closest we get to any kind of music 'specialism' here.