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Original poster

Should I let my twelve year old daughter have a pony?

11 replies

somewhereinwales · 14/02/2009 15:15

My soon to be twelve year old daughter is desperate for her own horse - but I am clueless about horses and we don't have land, although there are several livery stables within walking distance of our home. She goes to riding stables every week for three hours stable management/lessons and after lessons for three years has become quite competent - but I fear that it would be me getting up early/staying up late to muck out, feed, bring horse into stables etc. Our life is already really hectic - with three younger children too and both me and my husband working in demanding jobs. I'm also worried that she will want to join her friends with horses (who all live on farms but whose hobby she sooo covets) on long hacks around the country lanes where we live - which I think is unsafe. And she will want to go to endless pony club events and we haven't even got a 4x4 or a horse box! But perhaps she is ready to take the responsibility, although she already sings in a very active choir (Ysgol Glanaethwy!), has piano lessons and I have to fit in all my other childrens' extra curricular activities. How old are they before they can do all the horse caring and be trusted on the road themselves with a horse? Advice appreciated

OP posts:
LadyGlencoraPalliser · 14/02/2009 15:17

No idea, but you might want to repost this in the tack room forum where all the experts hang out.

Coldtits · 14/02/2009 15:17

No. It doesn't sound like you have the time or resources to look after one properly. Ponies are not a hobby, they are a way of life.

buktus · 14/02/2009 15:18

I was 14 before i was allowed out around the lanes on my own

GrapefruitMoon · 14/02/2009 15:19

Only if you are quite well off (horses & ponies are very expensive to "run") and only if she does all the work herself. If you suspect that you will end up doing the lion's share then I wouldn't go there (personally).

Marne · 14/02/2009 15:22

Could she get one on loan for the summer and see how it goes?

I would have loved a horse when i was her age but my parents couldn't afford to keep one, if you can afford it then i would say go 'go for it' but maybe on loan first.

Original poster
somewhereinwales · 14/02/2009 15:29

All good questions and good advice thanks. Resources not so much issue as time and commitment. Have investigated loan ponies - but they are few and far between in right category in our area. May stick with the weekly lessons for a couple of years until she is older and her younger sister (almost 9) can help out too.

OP posts:
Rindercella · 14/02/2009 15:35

I was going to suggest getting a shared pony. I used to do this alot with my horses in the past - someone would ride/look after the horse 2 or 3 days a week and in return pay me some money towards its keep. Imo it would be far better to use this as a trial to see if your daughter really does have the desire to have her own pony. Before you commit vast amounts of time & cash to buying your DD her own pony this may be a good test.

I am sure that there will be some people at your local stables looking for exactly this, especially in the current economic climate. I used to let my sharers compete, etc., on my horses so if you find the right person to share with, your DD should get all the fun of having a pony, but without so much risk or commitment (make sure the owner has adequate insurance, etc).

(I used to go out for hacks by myself & with friends when I was 11/12 years old - the thought horrifies me now! Eek)

OhYouBadBadKitten · 14/02/2009 15:38

If you really really think you can do this but want to put it off for another year or so, why don't you get her a pair of guinea pigs or something and tell her that for a full year she is solely responsible to seeing to them every day.

But to be honest, I think if you have horses they have to be the main number one thing in your life other than job and kids. They arent something you can just do on the side.

Can you do working livery?

LadyOfWaffle · 14/02/2009 15:42

I had a pony at 12 and I got up at 5 every morning to muck out and turn out, then took a bus after school to do other bits and bobs and got in about 8/9pm every night. On the other hand, you can do part livery where they will turn out etc. for you, some even muck out but you should be going there every day still. I loaned first (directly from a yard) for a few years so it was a massive part of my life more than a hobby. If she is commited it's worth it, it's brilliant, but it can be awful if you run out of enthusiasm for it. I loaned out my pony a few years ago because of the DCs.

LadyOfWaffle · 14/02/2009 15:42

I had a pony at 12 and I got up at 5 every morning to muck out and turn out, then took a bus after school to do other bits and bobs and got in about 8/9pm every night. On the other hand, you can do part livery where they will turn out etc. for you, some even muck out but you should be going there every day still. I loaned first (directly from a yard) for a few years so it was a massive part of my life more than a hobby. If she is commited it's worth it, it's brilliant, but it can be awful if you run out of enthusiasm for it. I loaned out my pony a few years ago because of the DCs.

Colonelcupcake · 18/02/2009 21:35

I would say only if you are either prepared to pay for livery or end up either selling or doing the majority of work your self however, she seems quite dedicated after doing it for 3 years and must at least semi realise what is involved. But personally I would think 12 is a bit too young and wait until she was 14 by which time you may have found a good 4x4

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